"You belong to a socalled tradesunion?" inquired Assemblyman Brown. "I will ask the honorable Mr Brown to modify his question by having the word 'socalled' struck from it." "I will inform the honorable attorney general that my question stands exactly as I phrased it," rejoined Assemblyman Brown sharply. "I'll remind the attorney general I myself am a member in good standing of a legitimate union, namely the International Brotherhood of Embalmers, Morticians, Gravediggers and Helpers, and when I asked the witness if he belonged to a socalled tradesunion I was referring to any one of those groups of Red conspirators who attempt to strangle the economic body by interfering with the normal course of business and mulcting honest citizens of tributary dues before they can pursue their livelihoods." Judge Robinson cupped his ear again and glared at me. "Speak up man; stop mumbling." "I don't belong to any union," I answered as soon as there was a chance for my words to be heard. Senator Jones took a notebook from his pocket, consulted it, put it back, scribbled something on the pad in front of him, tore it up, looked at his notebook again and asked, "What is your connection with this ... um ... grass?" "I applied Miss Francis' Metamorphizer to it, sir," I answered. "Nonsense," said Judge Robinson sharply. "Explain yourself," demanded Attorney General Smith. "Tell us just what this stuff is and how you applied it," suggested Henry Miller. "Don't mumble," ordered Judge Robinson. "I'm sorry, gentlemen, I don't know exactly what it is. Youll have to ask Miss Francis that. But--" Senator Jones interrupted me. "You mean to say you applied a chemical to someone's lawn, a piece of valuable property, without knowing its contents?" he asked sternly. "Well, Senator----" I began. "Do you habitually act in this irresponsible manner?" "Senator, I----" "Don't you understand, sir, that consequences necessarily follow actions? What sort of world would this be if everyone rushed around blindly using things of whose nature they were completely unaware?" "Don't mumble," warned Judge Robinson. I began to feel very low indeed and could only say haltingly, "I acted in good faith, gentlemen," when Mr Miller kindly recommended that I be excused since I had evidently given all the information at my command. "Subject to recall," growled Attorney General Smith. "Oh, certainly, sir, certainly," agreed Mr Miller, and I was thankfully released from my ordeal. "Josephine Spencer Francis." I cannot say Miss Francis had made any concessions in her appearance in deference to the committee, for she looked as though she had come straight from her kitchen, a suspicion strengthened by the strand of grass she carried in her fingers and played with absently throughout. She appeared quite at home as she settled herself in the chair, scanning with the greatest interest the faces of the committeemen as if she were memorizing each feature for future reference.