Grit LawlessYoung, F. E. Mills (Florence Ethel Mills)
Philosophy
Grit Lawless
Young, F. E. Mills (Florence Ethel Mills)
Africa -- Fiction
She flushed quickly. Some instinct told her that he was going to rejoin
the companion in whose society he had left Cape Town before. A chilled
look came into her eyes. It seemed that whenever she held out a hand
across the distances that separated them a great wall of his making rose
between them to divide them more certainly than before. And he
invariably made her aware of this wall at the very outset, so that her
every effort during the difficult interviews between them was but an
ineffectual hurling of herself against this impassable barrier. She
moved from behind the chair and seated herself.
"I'm sorry," she said simply. "Won't you sit down?" He accepted the
invitation, and leaning back surveyed her with a thoughtful interest
that was critical rather than admiring, and intensely curious. She had
some purpose in sending for him, he supposed. He wondered, with a
slight impatience, why she distressed herself so unnecessarily. They
had come long ago to the parting of the ways,--it was a mistake to go
out of one's road in order that the paths should recross merely to
separate again.
"I had no idea you would be leaving--so soon," she said. "I wasn't
aware you were in Cape Town until I passed you that morning in the car."
"I had only just got back," he explained.
"Afterwards I was sorry--that I didn't stop," she went on slowly,
labouring somewhat over the sentences. "But--I was surprised. And I
felt a little diffident about asking you to come out... I knew you
would come, of course... That's why, perhaps."
"My only wonder is that you take the trouble," he returned. "Plainly,
you don't get any joy of it... And hasn't it ever occurred to you that
it's painful for me as well? My life hasn't been wholly without
regrets. You remind me of the old Inquisitorial system--continually
stretching a man on the rack for some imaginary good purpose. And you
rack yourself in the process... Where's the sense in it, anyway?"
"I have thought," she said,--"I have tried--"
She got up abruptly from her seat and turned her back on him and walked
slowly down the long room, and stood by the fireplace with her elbow on
the mantel and her face dropped on her hand. He remained seated where
he was, and leaning forward, his hands between his knees, watched her
with interest. She made a curiously striking and graceful picture,
standing there with her half-averted face, the warm lamp-light falling
on her black-robed figure. There was a restrained yet dramatic appeal
in her attitude that touched him, and in the long drooping line of neck
and shoulder as it was turned towards him was a suggestion of weakness
that commended itself to his masculine mind. She looked lonely, and
sad, he considered.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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