"Because I went to something worse, to something infinitely terribly more ghastly. Trappists live in beautiful silent solitude; they have clean water, beds, regular meals, and peace. I went to live in intellectual silence and solitude in an ugly obscene mob, where clean water was a difficulty, food and a bed an uncertainty, and where I had the inevitable certainty of ceaseless and furious conflict." He hurled the words like javelins, and drew back in his chair. The old bitter feeling of disgust with himself inspired him. He feared lest perhaps he might have seemed to be pleading for sympathy. So he angrily watched to detect any signs of a wish to insult him with sympathy. But he really had gone far, far beyond the realm of human sympathy. _There was not a man on the earth who would have dared to risk rebuff, to persist against rebuff, to soar to him with that blessed salve of human sympathy--for which,--underneath his armour,--and behind his warlike mien,--he yearned._ Pity perhaps, horror perhaps, dislike perhaps, might have met him. But he only had emphasized his own fastidious aloofness. He had cleared-off the mire: but he had disclosed the cold of marble, not the warmth of human flesh. The cardinals remained silent for a minute. Then Ragna said "'An enemy hath done this!' Who is it?" George blazed with vigorous candid delight. "That is the first genuine word which I have had from the heart of Your Eminency!"--He returned to his repellent manner. "I gave the names of my calumniators to Cardinal Leighton." "Jerry Sant the Liblab, aided by the woman and a clot of worms who had turned;" Leighton said to Ragna. "Let them be smothered in the dung-hill. Anathema sint." Ragna growled. Again there was an exposition of silence in the throne-room. George was frozen hard and white. Ragna and Leighton continued to look at each other. Carvale's eyes had the blue brilliance of wet stars. Saviolli, Semphill, Talacryn, Whitehead, were as though they had seen the saxificous head of the Medoysa. Stirling gazed straight before him, in the manner of the sphinx carven of black basalt. George was watching them with half-shut eyes from the illimitable distance of his psychic altitude. Presently, the pure pale old face of Gentilotto and the pure pale young face of Van Kristen simultaneously were lifted; and their eyes met His. He blushed: slowly drew out the pontifical ring: and put it on His finger. "Lord Cardinals, it is Our will to be alone:" the Supreme Pontiff said. They came one by one and kissed His ring; and retired in silence. CHAPTER XXII When the door was shut, Hadrian remained quite motionless on the throne; and set Himself to review what He had said. He wondered whether He for once had got-down to and laid-bare the root of the matter: whether He for once had made His argument clear and convincing.--Good God! Who even could hope to be convincing?--He flung the thing away from Him; and for ever closed that volume of the book of His life.