A southern night began, as mild as it was silent. Svirski sheltered
himself in the coat lent him by the fisherman, and meditated: "All that
surrounds me is not only beauty, but truth as well. The life of man, if
it is to be normal, should be ingrafted on the trunk of nature, grow out
of it, as a branch grows out of a tree, and exist in virtue of those
same laws. Then it will be truthful and besides moral, for morality is
at bottom nothing else than the agreement of life with the universal law
of nature. For instance, simplicity and calm surrounds me; I understand
this, and I feel it is as an artist; but I haven't it in myself as a
man, for my life, and the life of these people among whom I live, has
departed from nature, it has ceased to fit itself to that law, to be its
result, and has made itself a lie. Everything in us is artificial, even
the feeling of natural laws has perished in us. Our relations are
founded on falsehood. Our senses are crooked; our souls and our impulses
sick. We deceive one another and even ourselves, till at last no man is
sure that he wishes really that toward which he is striving, or that he
will strive toward that which he wishes."
And there, in presence of that night, of that infinity of the sea, of
the stars, of all nature, of its calmness, its simplicity, its
immensity, he was seized by a feeling of the gigantic falsehood of the
relations between men. False seemed to him his love for Pani Elzen;
false her relation to him, to her children, to other men, to society;
false the life on that bright shore; false their present and false their
future. "I am encircled, as if by a net," thought he; "and I know not
how to tear myself out of it." And indeed that was true. For if all life
is a falsehood, what is to be done in face of that fact? Return to
nature? Begin some sort of life half savage, half peasant? Break with
people and become a reformer right away? Svirski felt too old for this,
and too sceptical. For such a course one needs to have the dogmatism of
Kresovich, and to feel evil as a spur to battle and reform, not as a
mere impression which may grow faint to-morrow! But another thought came
to Svirski's mind as a recompense. The man who does not feel in himself
power to reform the world, may flee from it, for a time, at least, and
draw breath. For instance, he could go to Marseilles the next day, and a
couple of days later somewhere else, out on the open ocean, hundreds of
miles from the shore, from sickly life, from lies and deceptions. In
this way all would be settled immediately, or rather cut off as if with
a knife.
And in one moment he was seized by such a desire to turn that idea into
action that he gave command to return to Nice.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account