It was nothing to me. I had no idea that this man’s
salvation meant my ruin. After removing the scaffold, I returned to my
master still full of hope, although slightly disappointed at losing the
golden crown, my fee for removing a head. That was not all. Next day I
received an order to leave the city, and an appointment as executioner
for the province of Throndhjem. A provincial hangman, and that in the
most miserable province of Norway! Now you shall see, gentlemen, how
small causes sometimes bring about great results. The count’s enemies,
by way of displaying their generosity, had done all in their power to
keep back the pardon until the execution was over. It lacked but one
minute; they blamed me for being so slow, as if it would have been
decent to prevent an illustrious man from amusing himself for a few
moments, before he breathed his last! As if a royal executioner
beheading a lord high chancellor could act with no more dignity and
sense of proportion than a country hangman turning off a Jew! Ill-will
was added to this. I had a brother; indeed, I think I have one still. He
had changed his name, and succeeded in finding employment in the house
of the new chancellor, Count d’Ahlefeld. My presence in Copenhagen
disturbed the scoundrel. My brother despised me, because it might some
time fall to my lot to hang him.”
Here the fluent narrator stopped to give vent to his mirth; then he went
on:--
“You see, my dear guests, that I made the best of it. The deuce take
ambition! I ply my calling honestly. I sell my dead bodies, or Becky
turns them into skeletons, which the Bergen anatomical museum buys. I
laugh at everything, even at that poor woman who was a gypsy, and whom
solitude has driven mad. My three heirs are growing up in the fear of
the Devil and the gallows. My name is the terror of all the children in
Throndhjem. The city council furnish me with a cart and red clothes.
The Cursed Tower protects me from rain as well as the bishop’s palace
could do. Old priests, driven hither by a storm, preach to me; learned
men fawn upon me. In fine, I am as happy as most people; I drink, eat,
hang, and sleep.”
The hangman did not close this long speech without frequent interludes
of beer and noisy bursts of laughter.
“He kills, and he sleeps!” murmured the minister; “poor wretch!”
“What a lucky fellow the rascal is!” exclaimed the hermit.
“Yes, brother monk,” said the hangman; “just as much of a rascal as you
are, but assuredly much luckier. You see, the business would be a
capital one if people did not seem to take pleasure in cutting down my
profits. Would you believe it, some great wedding has just afforded the
chaplain newly appointed to Throndhjem a pretext for asking the pardon
of twelve criminals who really belonged to me?”
“Belonged to you!” cried the minister.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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