American literature -- Periodicals; Civilization -- Periodicals; Culture -- Periodicals
he had been then) sitting with his first love in that old familiar place,
her hand clasped in his, her fair hair falling around her, and vailing the
face she hid upon his shoulder, and even more vividly still, the
remembrance of that Happiness which had ever been attendant on them then,
when the most trivial incidents of the day were turned into matters of
importance, colored and embellished as they were by love. He saw himself
in possession of the reality, which, alas! he had thrown away for the
shadow of it, and he longed for the recovery of those past years which had
been so unprofitably spent, in a vain attempt at regaining it. The girl
still sat by him; they did not seem to speak, and throughout that long
summer afternoon still they sat, she pulling the flowers (so lately
gathered) in pieces, and he playing with the ringlets of her hair. And now
the door opens, and his mother enters, older by many years than when she
last appeared to him, but still the same kind smile and earnest look of
affection as she turns toward her son. Her hand is laid upon his arm (as
he rises to meet her), and her soft voice utters his name, coupled with
endearment. “Mordant, dearest, Edith and myself wish to walk, if you will
accompany us?” “Certainly,” is the reply, and the three set out, and the
dreamer watched their fast receding forms down a shady lane, until a turn
lost them to his sight, and the retrospective view had vanished, but
quickly to be replaced by another.
Again he sees the same youth, this time impatiently walking up and down a
close, dismal room. The furniture is smoke-dried and dusty, once red, now
of a dark ambiguous color. The sofa is of horse-hair, shining (almost
white in places) from constant friction. On the mantlepiece hangs a
looking-glass, the frame wrapped round with yellow gauze to protect it
from dirt and here and there a fly-catcher, suspended from the ceiling,
annoys the inmate of the dusky room by its constant motion. It is a
lodging-house, ready furnished, and the young man, who has not left his
home many months, is not yet accustomed to the change, and he is wearied
and unhappy. He has just been writing to Edith, and the thought of her
causes him uneasiness; he is longing to be with her again. Restlessly he
paces up and down the narrow chamber, unwilling to resume studies, by the
mastery of which he could alone hope to be with her again, until a knock
at the hall-door makes him pause and sit down; another knock (as if the
visitor did not care to be kept waiting). Mordant knew what was coming; he
remembered it all, and felt no surprise at seeing in his dream a friend
(now long since dead) enter the apartment, with the exclamation of “What,
Lindsay! all alone? I had expected to find you out, I was kept so long
knocking at your door. How are you, old fellow?” and Charles Vernon threw
himself into a chair. “We are all going to the play,” continued he, “and a
supper afterward. You know Leclerque? he will be one of the party—will you
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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