Harper's New Monthly Magazine, No. V, October, 1850, Volume I.
General
Harper's New Monthly Magazine, No. V, October, 1850, Volume I.
American literature -- Periodicals; Civilization -- Periodicals; Culture -- Periodicals
thoughts of God and man? By such means may they not easily be led, if they
were at any unwilling, to give praise to God, and learn to join—not as a
superstitious rite, but as a humble duty—in His public worship? So talk
the sanitary men—here, as in all their doctrines, showing themselves
little better than materialists. The negro notion of a Sabbath is, that
nobody may fish: our notion is, that nobody may stay away from church.
In these remarks on exercise among adults, I have confined myself to the
plain exercise of walking. It may be taken for granted that no grown-up
person will be so childish as to leap, to row, to swim. A few Young
Englanders may put on, now and then, their white kid gloves to patronize a
cricket-match; but we can laugh at them. In a gentleman it is undignified
to run; and even walking, at the best, is vulgar.
Indeed there is an obvious vulgarity in the whole doctrine which would
call upon us to assist our brute development by the mere exercising of
ourselves as animals. Such counsel offers to degrade us to the low
position of the race-horse who is trotted to and fro, the poodle who is
sent out for an airing. As spiritual people, we look down with much
contempt upon the man who would in any thing compare us with the lower
animals. His mind is mean, and must be quite beneath our indignation. I
will say no more. Why thrash a pickpocket with thunder?
XII. A Bedroom Paper.
If you wish to have a thoroughly unhealthy bedroom, these are the
precautions you should take.
Fasten a chimney-board against the fireplace, so as to prevent foul air
from escaping in the night. You will, of course, have no hole through the
wall into the chimney; and no sane man, in the night season, would have a
door or window open. Use no perforated zinc in paneling; especially avoid
it in small bedrooms. So you will get a room full of bad air. But in the
same room there is bad, worse, and worst: your object is to have the worst
air possible. Suffocating machines are made by every upholsterer; attach
one to your bed; it is an apparatus of poles, rings, and curtains. By
drawing your curtains around you before you sleep, you insure to yourself
a condensed body of foul air over your person. This poison vapor-bath you
will find to be most efficient when it is made of any thick material.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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