Harper's New Monthly Magazine, No. XI.—April, 1851—Vol. II.Various
General
Harper's New Monthly Magazine, No. XI.—April, 1851—Vol. II.
Various
American literature -- Periodicals; Civilization -- Periodicals; Culture -- Periodicals
One night, I descended from my little room into the garden, and walked
about with my hat in my hand, for I felt feverish and excited.
Night after night, my sleep had been broken and disturbed by
dreams, that glided from my memory when I woke, but left a feeling of
despondency that followed me throughout the day. Sometimes, I thought,
myself, that my reason was deserting me. We were very busy at that time,
and Tom Lawton and I were to have worked together all the evening, but I
had left him; utterly unable to fix my attention upon what I set before
me. I paced to and fro several times, when passing by the window where I
had left him at work, I heard him speaking with some one. A word, which
I fancied having caught, made me curious, and I mounted upon a stone
ledge and listened; for the sliding pane of glass which served to
ventilate the Hall had been pushed back, and I could hear distinctly
when I applied my ear to the aperture. The light being inside, I could
not be seen, although I could see his desk. The lamp was shaded, and the
window was of stained glass, so that I did not see very clearly. But I
had a quick vision for such a scene as that before me.
That form standing beside Tom Lawton, with its hand in his, was Lucy's!
The blood rushed to my head. A thousand little lights were dancing
before my eyes. I felt myself falling, but I made an effort, and
clutched the window-sill and listened. It was Lucy's voice that I heard
first.
"Hush!" she said, "I heard a noise; there is some one coming.
Good-night! Good-night!"
"No, no," said Tom, "it is the wind beating the dead leaves against the
window."
They seemed to listen for a moment, and then he spoke again,
"Oh, Miss Lucy, do not run away before we have talked together a little.
I see you now so seldom, and when I do there are others present, and I
can not speak to you of what is always uppermost in my thoughts. I think
of you all day, and at night I long for the next morning, to be in the
same house with you, in the hope of seeing you before I go; though I am
continually disappointed. I think I am unfortunate in all but one thing,
though that consoles me for the rest--I think you love me a little,
Lucy."
"Yes, Tom, I do; a great deal. I have told you so many times, and I am
not ashamed to repeat it. I would not hide it from any one, if you did
not tell me to do so. But why do you tease yourself with fancies, and
think yourself unfortunate? I do not know why we should not tell him all
about it. He is the kindest being in the world, and I know he would not
thwart me in any thing that could procure my happiness; and then, again,
you are a favorite of his, and I am sure he would be delighted to think
that we loved each other."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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