And he proceeded to expend the "balance" in as round and condensed a volley of personal denunciation as had ever saluted the ears of the legal functionary. He then retired content. Something similar was the "change" given to one of our hack-drivers by a jolly tar, who was enjoying "a sail" in a carriage up Broadway. A mad bull, "with his spanker-boom rigged straight out abaft," or some other animal going "at the rate of fourteen knots an hour" in the street, attracted Jack's attention, as he rode along; and, unable to let the large plate-glass window down, he broke it to atoms, that he might thrust forth his head. "A dollar and a half for _that_!" says Jehu. "Vot of it?--here's the blunt," said the sailor, handing the driver a three-dollar note. "I can't change it," said the latter. "Well, never mind!" rejoined the tar; "_this_ will make it right!" The sudden crash of the _other_ window told the driver in what manner the "change" had been made! * * * * * Some bachelor-reader, pining in single-blessedness, may be induced, by the perusal of the ensuing parody upon Romeo's description of an apothecary, to "turn from the error of his way" of life, and both confer and receive "reward:" "I do remember an old Bachelor, And hereabout he dwells; whom late I noted In suit of sables, with a care-worn brow, Conning his books; and meagre were his looks; Celibacy had worn him to the bone; And in his silent chamber hung a coat, The which the moths had used not less than he. Four chairs, one table, and an old hair trunk, Made up 'the furniture;' and on his shelves A greasy candle-stick; a broken mug, Two tables, and a box of old cigars; Remnants of volumes, once in some repute, Were thinly scattered round, to tell the eye Of prying strangers, "_This man had no wife!_" His tattered elbow gaped most piteously; And ever as he turned him round; his skin Did through his stockings peep upon the day. Noting his gloom, unto myself I said: 'And if a man did covet single life, Reckless of joys that matrimony gives, Here lives a gloomy wretch would show it him In such most dismal colors, that the shrew, Or slut, or idiot, or the gossip spouse, Were each an heaven, compared to such a life!'" "There are always two sides to a question," the bachelor-"defendant" may affirm, in answer to this; and possibly himself try a hand at a contrast-parody. * * * * * There are a good many proverbs that will not stand a very close analysis; and some one who is of this way of thinking has selected a few examples, by way of illustration. The following are specimens: "_The more the merrier._"--Not so, "by a jug-full," one hand, for example, is quite enough in a purse.