And now, in addition, there was the pressure upon her of Ellesborough's
own high ideals and religious temper; of the ideals, also, of his family,
as he was tenderly and unconsciously revealing them. And, finally, there
was the daily influence of Janet's neighbourhood--Janet, so austere for
herself, so pitiful for others: Janet, so like Ellesborough in the
unconscious sternness of her moral outlook, so full, besides, of an
infinite sorrow for the sinner.
And between these two stood this variable, sensuous, woman's nature, so
capable both of good and evil. Rachel felt the burden of their virtues
too much for her, together with the sting of her own secret knowledge.
In some moments, even, she rebelled against her own passion. She had such
a moment of revolt, in this moonlit dark, as her eyes took in the farm,
the dim outlines of the farm buildings, the stacks, the new-ploughed
furrows. Two months earlier her life had been absorbed in simple, clear,
practical ambitions: how to improve her stock--how to grow another bushel
to the acre--how and when to build a silo--whether to try
electrification: a score of pleasant riddles that made the hours fly. And
now this old fever had crept again into her blood, and everything had
lost its savour. There were times when she bitterly, childishly,
regretted it. She could almost have hated Ellesborough, because she loved
him so well; and because of the terror, the ceaseless preoccupation that
her love had begun to impose upon her.
Janet, watching her come in, saw that the radiance had departed, and that
she crept about again like a tired woman. When, after nine o'clock, they
were alone by the fire, again and again it was on the tip of Janet's
tongue to say, "Tell me, who was Dick Tanner?" Then, in a sudden panic
fear, lest the words should slip out, and bring something irreparable,
she would get up, and make a restless pretence of some household work or
other, only to sit down and begin the same inward debate once more. But
she said nothing, and Rachel, too, was silent. She sat over the fire,
apparently half asleep. Neither of them moved to go to bed till nearly
midnight.
Then they kissed each other, and Janet raked out the fire.
"To-morrow!" she said, her eyes on the red glow of the embers,
"_to-morrow_!--Will it be peace?"
And then Rachel remembered that all the civilized world was waiting for
the words that would end the war. Somewhere in a French château there was
a group of men conferring, and on the issue of this night depended the
lives of thousands, and the peace of Europe.
Janet raised her clasped hands, and her plain, quiet face shone in the
candle-light. She murmured something. Rachel guessed it was a prayer. But
her own heart seemed dead and dumb. She could not free it from its load
of personal care; she could not feel the patriotic emotion which had
suddenly seized on Janet.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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