At length he fell back limply in his chair. A vast irksomeness had
taken possession of him. He was tired—tired of thinking of It—tired of
waiting for It to come. Why didn’t the clock hurry? The coming of Tayna
to the study alone brought a welcome to his eye. Tayna! So full of
buoyant, blooming youth; so quickly moved to tears of sympathy; so
lightly kindled to smiling, happy laughter! Tayna, her melting eyes,
her red cheeks, her one intermittent dimple, who flung her long arms
about her uncle and held him close and silently as if he had been a
lover!
But it was only a moment until Tayna too irked the tortured man. The
touch of her cheek upon his cheek and the aggressive mingling of her
thick braids with his own disheveled locks, once brushed so neat and
high, now so apt to loop disconsolate upon his temples, reminded him of
something quite unbearable but quite unbanishable,—a vision, and a
vision which must be entertained alone.
"Stay here and keep shop," her uncle said with sudden brusqueness,
forcing her down into his own chair at the desk. "I can see no one;
talk to no one; hear from no one. I am going up-stairs!"
"Up-stairs" meant the long, half-attic room in which Hampstead slept.
It ran the length of the cottage. There were windows in the gables, and
dormers were chopped in upon the side toward the Bay. At one end,
pushed back toward the eaves, was a bed, fenced from the eye by a
folding screen. Far at the other end was a table, a student-lamp and a
few books. Between lay a long, rug-strewn space which Hampstead called
his "tramping ground."
Here, when he wished to retire most completely from the public reach, he
made his lair. Upon that rug-strewn space he had tramped out many of
the problems of his ministry. In the past week he had walked miles
between one gable window and the other, and stopped as many times to
gaze out through the dormer windows over the crested tops of palms to
the dancing waters on the Bay.
But now he had retreated there, not to be alone, but because he felt a
sudden longing for companionship; and for a certain and particular
companionship. That touch of Tayna’s soft cheek upon his own had
brought with stinging poignancy the recollection of what the presence of
Bessie would be now,—Bessie as she once had been, dear, loyal,
sympathetic, wise; as she had begun to be again before that last trip
east; as she would have been when she returned and found him still
strong and faithful.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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