“Signora,” she said nervously, “here is a little letter--it is doubtless
from the Signore. He is perhaps detained--hospitable friends have kept
him--” Rose held out her hand for the letter. The Pinsents never made
fusses. They didn’t believe in bad things happening, and when they
happened they tried to look as if they weren’t bad.
This was the way Rose looked now. She smiled pleasantly at the Padrona,
and moved slowly away towards her room with the letter. She would not
hurry.
The Padrona gazed compassionately after her. “She is walking over a
precipice,” said the Padrona to herself, “as if it were a path in our
garden, Poverina!”
It was a very short letter.
“My dear,” Léon wrote in French, “I find I must go to Naples. It will
not be for long I leave you, and I have told them all to look after you
until my return. Forgive me. Léon.”
After all he could not lie to Rose.
She read his letter three times. The first two times she translated his
letter into English, and wondered why Léon had gone to Naples. The third
time she read it without translating it, and then she knew everything.
She knew everything in all the world.
But she could not quite believe it. The arrogance in her rose up and
fought against the truth.
Rose had very little arrogance, but all women who have been loved must
have some. Surely he who was so much her lover could not have left her
so soon?
She remembered that when she had said to her mother, “But I could never
leave Léon,” Mrs. Pinsent had made no direct response. Her mother had
realized that that wasn’t the only question. How had she realized this?
Had her father ever--? Rose buried her face in her hands and wept
bitterly. “Oh, poor mother!” she murmured, “poor mother!” She could not
see herself as wholly poor yet.
And then she remembered Léon’s face as he passed her, his sad, ashamed
face, and she knew now why he had left her; but that he did not want to
leave her.
She sat up very straight and stopped crying when she realized this.
She thought it very strange, for she knew quite well that Madame Gérard
didn’t love Léon, either. She loved her own husband, Rose had seen this;
she knew it as if it were in the multiplication table; but she couldn’t
think of Madame Gérard now, she wasn’t her business. Léon was her
business. She must understand, why he had done this thing. It wasn’t any
use being silly and just crying, then it might happen again, and it
should never happen again; she wasn’t going to have Léon looking ashamed
twice.
From the first what wrung her heart was that Léon would feel it so! He
had meant to be such a help, he nearly had been, and if he hadn’t been
wasn’t it because Rose had failed him? She hadn’t meant to fail him of
course, she had meant just the opposite; but that was before she knew
all about everything, and before you know how to mean, meaning isn’t
going to be much of a help.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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