“You, Mrs. Brown, are that lady. You will please sit just there, as
near to the fire as you can get without burning yourself. I propose to
make the tea, for I am so expert in the art that I yield to none. And
I shall ask you to pour it out, while I proceed to serve the eggs and
bacon, which look perfectly delicious.”
The charwoman, however, betrayed no sign of assenting to this
arrangement.
“I am sure, sir, it is meant in great kindness,” she said humbly, “but
I could not think of such a thing. You see I have been in good service,
sir, and I beg your pardon, sir, but it is never done.”
“‘Never’ is a dangerous word to employ, Mrs. Brown,” said Northcote,
towering over the old woman in a formidable manner. “In fact, I allow
none to employ it to me. Sit down, if you please, and pour out the tea,
and just have the goodness to imagine yourself the Lady Elizabeth
Who-was-it, famous alike for her breeding and her beauty, while I shall
endeavor to consider myself that distinguished nobleman, the Earl of
What’s-his-name.”
“The Lady Elizabeth Plumptre, sir, and the Earl of Widmerpool.”
“Very well. Now I say, ‘Betty, my gal, have an egg with your bacon?’
and you reply with a quiet ease and distinction of manner, ‘Yes, papa,
if you please,’ Now then, down you get into your chair, and spare me
the necessity of arguing the point. I am so apt to lose my temper if I
argue the point.”
The old woman, who was too much in fear of him to risk anything of the
kind, took her place at the table immediately.
“One of these days,” said Northcote, handing her an egg and some bacon
on the only plate that did not happen to be cracked, “I should like
you to meet my mother. She is a very notable and good woman, with a
remarkably resolute conception of her duty, which all her life she has
rendered bluntly and directly without ever speaking of it to a human
soul. She has ordered her life in the manner that she deems necessary
to the rôle of an eminent Christian. She has brought up her only son
in simple and pious resolves, educated him quite beyond her means, has
found him money when in order to do so she has been compelled to deny
herself life’s common necessaries, yet has asked alms of none, and at
Christmas time never omits to dispense charity to others.”
“I should like to see your mother, sir,” said the charwoman, folding
her hands meekly and sitting very upright on her chair. “I am sure she
is a very good lady.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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