England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Indiana -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction; Mate selection -- Fiction
"Because you yourself have acknowledged it would not be right," he
answered, coldly. Her small, red lips drooped plaintively, she coiled
herself up on the sofa in a disconsolate attitude. Thurston stood
watching her. The sad, little face staring at the fire, stirred his
sympathy. This was the first request he had ever refused. He felt an
impulse to press her against his heart and beg her not to grieve—to tell
her that he felt her disappointment far deeper than she herself could
have any idea of. But pride prevented him. He had lately been chary in
his demonstrations. His nature, which at first had sung a pæan over the
mere fact that she was his, rejoicing in the lavish display of its love,
gradually conscious of no hint of response, only a tacit acceptance, had
crept back into its cloak of reserve. He suffered from the repression,
becoming at times the victim of a terrible discouragement—that sinking
of the heart, inevitable to the thought that one has given one’s very
best in vain. He realized what a frail structure he had builded—that
beautiful fairy fabric of spider’s webs, illuminated with the tints of
the rainbow. Standing, watching Indiana, Thurston remembered the day
when she had promised to marry him—that gray, soft, still evening in
autumn. It had been like a tender poem. He had likened the little path
between the trees upon which they walked, to the dim, narrow aisle of a
church, leading to the altar. It had led them to the altar, but he had
failed yet to realize the dream, the infinite suggestion beyond. He
felt they were still kneeling there. He and the church had done their
part. It needed Indiana only to make the bond complete. He suffered in
a great measure for her sake alone. Could she respect her own womanhood
as his wife when she failed to love him, he asked himself. She, too,
might be suffering, without his knowledge. The little figure maintained
its disconsolate position. It was only a trivial matter, after all, but
he did not want her to harbor the least resentment against him.
"Indiana," he said, tenderly, placing his hand on her head, "do you
remember the day I asked you to be my wife? Do you forget already the
condition upon which you accepted me?"
"What condition?" asked Indiana, innocently.
"That I should not give in."
"Oh!" exclaimed Indiana, falling back on the sofa. If he brought up
that justification, there was no longer any ground to argue upon.
"I have never in my life broken my word once given. This is our first
difference. I must keep my promise to you. No matter how much I
suffer, I will not give in." He tucked her in the rug again,
extinguished the lamp, and left the room.
*CHAPTER XVI.*
*An Escapade*
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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