England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction
'Yes, I am vexed,' he continued sitting down by her; but his tone was
more gentle now. 'I am vexed that you are hiding from us that you are
suffering. You keep us all in the dark; you deny you are ill. I think
you are treating us all very badly.'
'No--no,' she returned, with difficulty. 'I am not ill--you must not
tell me so.' And her cheek paled perceptibly.
'Have you turned coward suddenly?' he replied, with a keen look at her.
'I have heard you say more than once that the dread of illness was
unknown to you; that you could have walked a fever hospital without a
shudder. What has become of your courage, Miss Lambert?'
'I am not afraid, but I do not want to be ill,' she returned, faintly.
'That is more unlike you than ever. Impatience, want of submission, do
not certainly belong to your category of faults. Well, if you promise to
follow my prescription, I think I can undertake that you shall not be
ill.'
Mildred drew a long sigh of relief; the sigh of an oppressed heart was
not lost on Dr. Heriot.
'But you must get rid of what is on your mind,' he went on, quickly. 'If
other people's burdens lie heavily, you must shift them to their own
shoulders and think only of yourself. Now I want to ask you a few
questions.'
Mildred looked frightened again, but something in Dr. Heriot's manner
this morning constrained her to obey. His inquiries were put skilfully,
and needed only a yea and nay, as though he feared she would elude him.
Mildred found herself owning to loss of appetite and want of sleep; to
languor and depression, and a tendency to excessive irritation; noises
jarred on her; a latent excitement took the place of strength. She had
lost all pleasure in her duties, though she still fulfilled them.
'And now what does this miserable state of the nerves mean?' was his
next question. Mildred said nothing.
'You have suffered no shock--nothing has alarmed you?' She shook her
head.
'You cannot eat or sleep; when you speak you change colour with every
word; you are wasted, getting thinner every day, and yet there is no
disease. This must mean something, Miss Lambert--excuse me; but I am
your friend as well as your doctor. I cannot work in the dark.'
Mildred's lips quivered. 'I want change--rest. I have had anxieties--no
one can be free in this world. I am getting too weak for my work.' What
a confession from Mildred! At another time she would have died rather
than utter it; but his quiet strength of will was making evasion
impossible. She felt as though this friend of hers was reading her
through and through. She must escape in some measure by throwing herself
upon his mercy.
He looked uneasy at that; his eyes softened, then suffused.
'I thought as much,' he muttered; 'I could not be deceived by that
face.' And a great pity swelled up in his heart.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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