Hey Rub-a-dub-dub: A Book of the Mystery and Wonder and Terror of LifeDreiser, Theodore
General
Hey Rub-a-dub-dub: A Book of the Mystery and Wonder and Terror of Life
Dreiser, Theodore
American essays -- 20th century
(_Wildly, his fancy flaming furiously._) Oh, ho, ho, ho! I am God! I am
that I am--all in all! I am my dream of myself! I will dream me dreams,
visions. These are my creations, all! (_He turns and surveys his endless
fancies of horror and delight._) Oh, ho, ho, ho! Come, Art! Come, Love!
Come, Hope! Come, Death! Dream as I dream! Create destiny, suffer! I am
God! I cannot die! Insane! Insane! Insane! Oh, ho, ho, ho! (_He shouts
in agony, then joy, then sobs, staggering as he does so, ending in a
gale of lunatic laughter._)
PITY
(_To_ LOVE, _hovering near_.) We are his children; and we can do
nothing?
LOVE
Nothing, save he think on us.
PITY
(_To_ HOPE.) Canst thou do nothing?
HOPE
Nothing, save he think on me and thee.
HATE
(_Clasping the hand of_ DESPAIR.) Come aside. Are not we his thought
also? What have we in common with them?
DESPAIR
(_Darkly._) Nothing! Nothing! Yet are we his thought also, but not of
them! No, no, no! He should sleep again! He should sleep!
THE LORD OF THE UNIVERSE
(_Staggering and writhing._) Oh, ho, ho, ho! Oh, ho, ho, ho! I am God! I
dream me dreams! I build me endless wonders, endless pleasures, endless
horrors! Oh, ho, ho, ho! (_He staggers madly on._)
BEAUTY
Build thou me temples of beauty, Lord! I will be worshiped! I will be
worshiped!
AMBITION
Make thou me worlds and legions! Worlds! Worlds! And legions! I would
rule! I would slay! I would burn!
LOVE
Oh, but wilt thou make flowers and vast realms of quiet places, Lord? Or
but little valleys, if thou wilt? Make streams and pretty shelters! Give
not all to Ambition, Lord! Give not all to war!
HATE
(_Springing before his face._) Make thou me implements of terror! Create
thou me forms of horror, of evil! Spin thou me dark chains and darker
places! Make thou tortures of failure and regret, Lord--tortures!
Tortures! (_He glowers about him._)
PITY
Nay, Lord, let not all be of horror and hate! Think thou on me, Lord, of
sweet pity and tender things! Or, if thou canst not, think thou but of
ways that I may heal what Hate will destroy, what Ambition would crush.
Think thou thus, Lord! I am a thought of thine also!
THE LORD OF THE UNIVERSE
(_Wearily._) Oh, ho, ho, ho! (_He staggers on._)
FEAR
Lord, do thou protect me! Do thou conceal me! Forget me not, Lord!
Forget me not! I fear! I fear!
DESPAIR
Why dost thou not sleep, Lord? Of what avail are we, thy fancies? Oh,
why dost thou not sleep? Sleep! Sleep! Sleep!
THE LORD OF THE UNIVERSE
(_Staggering on._) Oh, ho, ho, ho! Oh, ho, ho, ho! Space--Time--I have
made me these! Suns--Planets--I have made me these! Love--Hate--I have
made me these! Hope--Fear--I have made me these! Beauty--I have made me
this! Oh, ho, ho, ho! Oh, ho, ho, ho! (_He staggers on, gesticulating
and laughing stupendously._)
BEAUTY
(_Wildly._) I will be worshiped! I will be worshiped!
SCENE II: THE HOUSE OF LIFE.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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