(_Scratching one ear and blinking his one open eye, the while the five thousand Nizys distribute souffle and the audience cheers vociferously._) Descendant Sons and Daughters of Ancient and Honorable Free and Accepted Boy Scouts, Watch and Ward Guards, King’s Daughters, Sabbath Day Adventists, Holy Rollers (_whispers to a Dizzard, “Did I get them all right?”_)--we have, as you know, as President and Referendunces of this great Court, founded so long ago by our worthy predecessor, Mush Mush I, a certain duty to perform, and that is the asking of our regular prepared and revered and revised Sacred Questions, the answers to which, given as we all know you will give them, constitute in themselves at once a record and a testimony to the wisdom, perfection, peace and plenty to which our vast Federated Republics and Peoples the world over have at last arrived. (_Great applause lasting one hour, during which transcripts of the proceedings and speech thus far are wirelessed by the Fuddys to all parts of the world._) Once, as you well know and as we are sorry to remember, there existed a certain amount of vice and crime in the world (_vast and prolonged boo-ing and cat-calling_)--less and less, we will admit, as the forces of righteousness and order such as we represent here to-day gained momentum (_a second burst of applause lasting one hour, during which this portion of the speech is wirelessed. The Zadkiels breathe heavily_), but plentiful enough--plentiful enough, I am glad to say--Souffle! Souffle! (_he sighs and is fed_)--as well as a tendency, disobedient in the extreme, to investigate and study and doubt everything, from stars to ant-hills, and even to make light of the revealed and divine facts of Nature, which as we all know are irrefutable and not to be questioned and to which our hearts are always and only our best guides. (_Enormous applause, lasting thirty minutes._) Fortunately for us now, however, and happily, and owing, as I may say, to the benign activities of those noble workers in the cause of righteousness, Mush Mush I, Bonehead V, and Dish Rag III, who flourished A. D. 1970-2061 in America and elsewhere, the virtues of sobriety, justice, truth, mercy, industry and the like were, as we all well know, firmly and finally established. (_Tremendous applause, lasting one hundred and eight minutes, during which seven hundred wash-boilers of souffle are consumed. Wireless messages are sent to all parts._) Thanks to them and their beneficent efforts, we do not attempt to investigate any more. (_Prolonged cheering._) We do not seek to reason any more. (_Immense cheering, lasting two hours._) Man, as you all well know, has seen the line of his duty and has followed it closely. (_More cat-calling._) With the greatest care we have been able to eliminate not only those besetting vices which scarred the face of man with their hideous thoughts, but also those equally great vices of curiosity and