History of the Prophet Joseph, by His MotherSmith, Lucy
History
History of the Prophet Joseph, by His Mother
Smith, Lucy
Smith, Joseph, Jr., 1805-1844
When Joseph had taken a little nourishment, according to the directions
of the stranger, he requested us to send immediately for Mr. Harris.
This we did without delay. And when we had given the stranger his
breakfast, we commenced preparing breakfast for the family; and we
supposed that Mr. Harris would be there, as soon as it was ready, to
eat with us, for he generally came in such haste when he was sent for.
At eight o'clock we set the victuals on the table, as we were expecting
him every moment. We waited till nine, and he came not--till ten, and
he was not there--till eleven, still he did not make his appearance.
But at half past twelve we saw him walking with a slow and measured
tread towards the house, his eyes fixed thoughtfully upon the ground.
On coming to the gate, he stopped, instead of passing through, and got
upon the fence, and sat there some time with his hat drawn over his
eyes. At length he entered the house. Soon after which we sat down to
the table, Mr. Harris with the rest. He took up his knife and fork as
if he were going to use them, but immediately dropped them. Hyrum,
observing this, said "Martin, why do you not eat; are you sick?" Upon
which, Mr. Harris pressed his hands upon his temples, and cried out in
a tone of deep anguish, "Oh, I have lost my soul! I have lost my soul!"
Joseph who had not expressed his fears till now, sprang from the table,
exclaiming, "Martin, have you lost that manuscript? have you broken
your oath, and brought down condemnation upon my head as well as your
own?"
"Yes; it is gone," replied Martin, "and I know not where."
"Oh, my God!" said Joseph, clinching his hands. "All is lost! all is
lost! What shall I do? I have sinned--it is I who tempted the wrath
of God. I should have been satisfied with the first answer which I
received from the Lord; for he told me that it was not safe to let the
writing go out of my possession." He wept and groaned, and walked the
floor continually.
At length he told Martin to go back and search again.
"No;" said Martin, "it is all in vain; for I have ripped open beds and
pillows; and I know it is not there."
"Then must I," said Joseph, "return with such a tale as this? I dare
not do it. And how shall I appear before the Lord? Of what rebuke am I
not worthy from the angel of the Most High?"
I besought him not to mourn so, for perhaps the Lord would forgive him,
after a short season of humiliation and repentance. But what could I
do to comfort him, when he saw all the family in the same situation of
mind as himself; for sobs and groans, and the most bitter lamentations
filled the house. However, Joseph was more distressed than the rest, as
he better understood the consequences of disobedience. And he continued
pacing back and forth, meantime weeping and grieving, until about
sunset, when, by persuasion, he took a little nourishment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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