“But I have gone too far?”
She bowed her face gravely.
“And so,” he said bitterly, “after all that I have gone through, and all
I’ve done, you want me to give this fortune up. My God, Elsie, you know
what a hateful thing poverty is as well as I do. Think what this money
would buy. Love for one another we have already, and we can get besides
every pleasure the heart can wish for. I know as well as you do that it
was dirtily earned, and I hated the work of getting it, and I’ll never
dabble in anything so foul again. My instincts bid me live as an upright
gentleman, and with the proper income I could do that, and forget I was
ever anything else. When I cease to be poor, I cease to be in the way of
temptation. Don’t you see? And, besides, there is no chance of being
found out. The money is supposed to be blotted out of existence, and
it’s there now in the ’Glades as a private mine to dig at as we choose.
Besides, I’m bound in honor to go on after getting thus far. It isn’t as
if I were working for my own hand alone. Shelf’s my partner, and I can’t
neglect Shelf’s interests for a sentiment.”
“Mr. Shelf may do as he chooses, Pat; you yourself may do as you choose,
dear; but I can’t alter what I’ve said. I love money, Heaven knows,
but I couldn’t use money of that sort. You might forget how it came: I
couldn’t. I can’t forget some things. I’ve a terrible memory when I don’t
want it to act. I tried to forget you, Pat, ever since you left us in
England till the day I saw you here, but I couldn’t. I used to pray for
forgetfulness all those years, and it wouldn’t come; and if I were to
marry you now, dear, with that money, I should always remember, just in
the same way.”
“What is the use of carrying thumbscrews in your pocket?” he asked half
angrily.
She smiled a little pained smile. “Can’t help it, Pat. I suppose it’s the
way I’m built. But I’m only telling you facts.”
“I thought,” he said brusquely, “you wanted to go back into society, and
have a steam yacht; and do things comfortably. Now, without this quarter
of a million which is lying ready to be picked up, you have two hundred
a year, and I have three, which make five hundred pounds in all. I might
point out to you that one can’t do much continuous splashing amongst
smart people on that, in London or anywhere else. Unless, of course, you
married some one else.”
She flushed painfully. “Oh, Pat,” she said, “I don’t think I deserved
that from you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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