Hope Mills; Or, Between Friend and SweetheartDouglas, Amanda M.
Philosophy
Hope Mills; Or, Between Friend and Sweetheart
Douglas, Amanda M.
Fiction
How breathlessly he waited for Miss McLeod's answer! The morning's mail
did not bring it; night closed in without it. A chill drizzle had set
in, freezing as it fell, and the keen air fairly flayed one's skin. Yet
he dreaded to go in-doors, to hear his mother's pleasant voice. Cousin
Jane had been called away by the illness and possible death of a
relative, so they two were alone.
When Mrs. Darcy saw her son so grave and pre-occupied, his eyes sadly
pathetic with trouble, mother-like, she tried to comfort with the small
talk that women often offer, and that answers the purpose like bathing
one's brow with Florida-water in a severe headache. She never mentioned
business to him when in such moods. Now it was a bit of
newspaper-gossip, concerning some discoveries in Greece, that he and
Maverick had been quite eager about.
The poor fellow was distraught, and could not listen. He ate his supper,
choking down the food, for her dear sake, missing strangely Cousin
Jane's pungency and seasoning. Then he tried to interest himself in the
paper, but could not; he paced the floor softly; he whistled a tune, for
his mother's benefit also, but broke down in the middle.
"I must go out a little while," he declared in desperation.
"Not in this storm," said his mother pleadingly.
"Yes. I'll be back by--ten," looking at the clock. "It is too bad to
leave you alone," with sudden regret, kissing her tenderly.
"I shall not mind for a while. But this wretched storm"--
He laughed, a little strained and forced; then he put on his great-coat,
almost wishing that every man in the country was without, and had to buy
one to-morrow. He tramped up the street, drawing long respirations,
every one of which was nearly a sigh. Was this the way Mr. Lawrence felt
when times went bad? Was some such trouble the cause of that fatal
disaster? He bowed his head in a sort of touching and profound respect
to the dead man. He experienced an earnest sympathy for all struggling
capitalists. What did unreasoning labor know of such nights as these
when every thing, even good name, was at stake! He wondered if his mop
of curly hair would turn gray, and then, in a ridiculously trivial
mood, remembered he must go and have it cropped. As well now as any
time; but when he reached the barber's, the place looked so uninviting,
with the smoky kerosene-lamps turned low. He did not stop: he used to
wonder afterward how it would have been if he had, until he came to have
a sincere and reverent belief in God as the disposer of human events,
the Hand back of the curtain, that guided every step, and kept sacred
watch even over two sparrows.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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