How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to MarriageHardy, E. J. (Edward John)
General
How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to Marriage
Hardy, E. J. (Edward John)
Marriage
"The deception," says Sydney Smith, "as practised upon human creatures,
is curious and entertaining. My friend sups late; he eats some strong
soup, then a lobster, then some tart, and he dilutes these esculent
varieties with wine. The next day I call upon him. He is going to sell
his house in London, and to retire into the country. He is alarmed for
his eldest daughter's health. His expenses are hourly increasing, and
nothing but a timely retreat can save him from ruin. All this is the
lobster: and when over-excited nature has had time to manage this
testaceous encumbrance, the daughter recovers, the finances are in good
order, and every rural idea effectually excluded from the mind. In the
same manner old friendships are destroyed by toasted cheese, and hard,
salted meat has led to suicide. Unpleasant feelings of the body produce
correspondent sensations in the mind, and a great scene of wretchedness
is sketched out by a morsel of indigestible and misguided food. Of such
infinite consequence to happiness is it to study the body!"
On the other hand, "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine." We should
"laugh and be well," as enjoined by an old English versifier.
"To cure the mind's wrong bias, spleen,
Some recommend the bowling-green;
Some, hilly walks; all, exercise;
Fling but a stone, the giant dies;
_Laugh and be well._ Monkeys have been
Extreme good doctors for the spleen;
And kitten, if the humour hit,
Has harlequined away the fit."
It is the bounden duty of those who live together to cultivate the sunny
side of life. To rejoice with those who rejoice is as much a duty as to
weep with those that weep. Many have not that "great hereditary
constitutional joy" which springs from a natural genius for happiness,
but all may at least try to add to the stock of the household's
cheerfulness. It is about the most useful contribution that any member
of a family can make.
"As, although in the season of rainstorms and showers,
The tree may strike deeper its roots;
It needs the warm brightness of sunshiny hours,
To ripen the blossoms and fruits."
Sunlike pleasures never shine in idle homes. If a useful occupation or
innocent hobby be not provided for the several members of a family, they
are sure to spend their time in maliciously tormenting each other.
Those whose only care in life is to avoid care make a great mistake.
They forget that even roses have thorns, and that pleasure is
appreciated and enjoyed for its variety and contrast to pain. After all
there is but one way of producing sunshine in our homes. We must first
let the light into our own souls, and then like burning glasses we shall
give it out to others, but especially to those of our own household. And
whence comes the soul's calm sunshine and joy in right doing but from
the Sun of Righteousness?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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