How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to MarriageHardy, E. J. (Edward John)
General
How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to Marriage
Hardy, E. J. (Edward John)
Marriage
How terrible it is when a much-desired child is born to a comparatively
useless existence by reason of some deficiency or deformity. Very
touching is the story of a lady who, though deaf and dumb, became the
wife of an earl through her beauty. In due course the king o' the world,
the baby, presented himself--a fine child, of course, and a future earl.
Soon after its birth, as the nurse sat watching the babe, she saw the
countess mother approach the cradle with a huge china vase, lift it
above the head of the sleeping child, and poise it to dash it down.
Petrified with horror, wondering at the strange look of the mother's
face, the nurse sat powerless and still; she dared not even cry out; she
was not near enough to throw herself between the victim and the blow.
The heavy mass was thrown down with a tremendous force and crash on the
floor beside the cradle, and the babe awoke terrified and screaming,
clung to his delighted mother, who had made the experiment to discover
whether her child had the precious gift of voice and hearing, or was
like herself, a mute.
In his "Bachelor's Complaint of the Behaviour of Married People,"
Charles Lamb speaks of "the airs which these creatures give themselves
when they come, as they generally do, to have children. When I consider
how little of a rarity children are--that every street and blind alley
swarms with them--that the poorest people commonly have them in most
abundance--that there are few marriages that are not blest with at least
one of these bargains--how often they turn out ill and defeat the fond
hopes of their parents, taking to vicious courses, which end in poverty,
disgrace, the gallows, &c.--I cannot for my life tell what cause for
pride there can possibly be in having them. If they were young
phoenixes, indeed, that were born but one in a hundred years, there
might be a pretext. But when they are so common----"
It is, however, far better for married people to take pride in their
children than to be as indifferent to them as was a certain old lady who
had brought up a family of children near a river. A gentleman once said
to her, "I should think you would have lived in constant fear that some
of them would have got drowned." "Oh no," responded the old lady, "we
only lost three or four in that way."
What is the use of a child? Not very much unless its parents accept it,
not as a plaything, much less as a nuisance, but as a most sacred
trust--a talent to be put to the best account. It is neither to be
spoiled nor buried in the earth--how many careless mothers do this
literally!--but to be made the most of for God and for man. Perhaps
there was only One who perfectly understood the use of a child. "Suffer
the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is
the kingdom of God." In some lines to a child Longfellow has well
answered the question we have been considering.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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