Quoth he, In all my past adventures I ne'er was set so on the tenters; 60 Or taken tardy with dilemma, That ev'ry way I turn does hem me, And with inextricable doubt Besets my puzzled wits about: For tho' the dame has been my bail, 65 To free me from enchanted jail, Yet as a dog, committed close For some offence, by chance breaks loose, And quits his clog, but all in vain, He still draws after him his chain; 70 So, though my ankle she has quitted, My heart continues still committed; And like a bail'd and main-priz'd lover, Altho' at large, I am bound over; And when I shall appear in court, 75 To plead my cause, and answer for't, Unless the judge do partial prove, What will become of me and love? For if in our account we vary, Or but in circumstance miscarry; 80 Or if she put me to strict proof, And make me pull my doublet off, To shew, by evident record Writ on my skin, I've kept my Word; How can I e'er expect to have her, 85 Having demurr'd onto her favour? But faith, and love, and honour lost,. Shall be reduc'd t' a Knight o' th' Post. Beside, that stripping may prevent What I'm to prove by argument, 90 And justify I have a tail And that way, too, my proof may fail. Oh that I cou'd enucleate, And solve the problems of my fate Or find, by necromantick art, 95 How far the dest'nies take my part For if I were not more than certain To win and wear her, and her fortune, I'd go no farther in his courtship, To hazard soul, estate, and worship 100 For though an oath obliges not Where any thing is to be got, (As thou last prov'd) yet 'tis profane, And sinful, when men swear in vain. Quoth RALPH, Not far from hence doth dwell 105 A cunning man, hight SIDROPHEL, That deals in destiny's dark counsels, And sage opinions of the Moon sells; To whom all people, far and near, On deep importances repair; 110 When brass and pewter hap to stray, And linen slinks out of the way; When geese and pullen are seduc'd, And sows of sucking-pigs are chows'd; When cattle feel indisposition, 115 And need th' opinion of physician; When murrain reigns in hogs or sheep. And chickens languish of the pip; When yeast and outward means do fail, And have no pow'r to work on ale: 120 When butter does refuse to come, And love proves cross and humoursome: To him with questions, and with urine, They for discov'ry flock, or curing. Quoth HUDIBRAS, This SIDROPHEL 125 I've heard of, and should like it well, If thou canst prove the Saints have freedom To go to Sorc'rers when they need 'em.