I was sitting in a rather large group of patients in the dayroom. A
casual conversation ensued about Thanksgiving as it had been and
Christmas as it might be. There was talk of having been at home and
plans for being at home. I supported and encouraged the discussion
because of the meaningfulness of holidays, past and present. Snow was
initiated as a {116} topic. I said, "It would be nice to have a white
Christmas, but not too white." Vincent, a stiff, exact, ritualistic
person who avoids stepping in an obvious fashion on thresholds, does
little jiggle-like dance steps before sitting down, and again before
settling in his chair, suddenly spoke. "Josephine, I beg your pardon,
but I must take issue with you." I encouraged his unusual behavioral
expression. He went on and on about the importance of a white Christmas.
I let my mind flow with his jumbled discourse trying to decipher what he
was getting at rather than each specific rapidly mentioned issue. He
went from white to black, day to night, goodness to badness, love to
hate, this side of the world to the other side of the world (Vietnam). I
expressed that he seemed to keep mentioning two sides of things and that
for some reason I could not help thinking of boys and girls. I said that
he was over on that side of the world (room) and that I was over on this
side of the world. I asked why he did not come over to my side, paused a
minute, felt this was asking too much of this patient, and said, "Well
I'll come over to your side then." When I sat down next to Vincent, he
giggled as he does. Arthur, a younger patient, made a critical jealous
type comment about Vincent's age (50ish). Arthur has done this before
when I give attention to Vincent. Has Arthur a stereotype of father
images and perhaps mother images? I said to Vincent "you have beautiful
white hair, and big, brown, smiling Italian eyes." Vincent sat back
smiling shyly but comfortably and the discussion of the group continued.
6. I supported patients' rights to loving relationships with
others: families, other staff, and other patients.
_Example_
Alice M. said that she was sad to be back at the hospital after her
weekend at home. Alice is a quiet, bland, soft-spoken person about
fifty. She wears a worried expression even when she smiles and strikes
me like she is "turned inside" herself. I encouraged her to talk about
her time at home. She told me about how they had painted the living room
with what for her was a show of real excitement. I said that her wish to
be at home was very understandable. I did this because this patient
almost whispers her wish to be at home and, generally, no one responds
to it. Alice talked on with encouragement about the single sister whom
she visits and the pleasure it gives her to be with this sister.
[I have other examples of this nurse behavior that indicate supporting
of relationships between patients and between patients and other
personnel.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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