English literature -- Early modern, 1500-1700; English wit and humor; Great Britain -- Civilization -- 17th century -- Literary collections
[26.] A man was condemned the last Sessions to be hang'd for a
Robbery; but before and after he was condemned, his careful, dear, and
loving wife bid him take no care; for she had took care that he should
not die; which made the man live more dissolutely than he would have
done, but for his wife's confidence; which Confidence she continued
to him till the night before he was to be hang'd; and then she came to
him and told him, That all the great Promises made to her were come to
nothing; for she could not procure him a Pardon by any means whatever;
which put the poor man into such a Grief and Trembling that he was
scarce himself. Come, husband, says she, take Heart, for though I
cannot get you a Pardon, yet I'll tell you what I'll do for you; I
will make you an excellent Cawdle tonight, which will make you sleep
well, and another to morrow morning to comfort up your heart before
you are hang'd: for truly I believe it troubles you as well as me,
that I could not get your pardon; therefore pass it by this once; but
if ever you come to be hang'd again, I'll warrant you, I'll get you
pardon.
Says a man nam'd _John_, [12.]
In every place the Sun
Does rise every Morning soon;
'Tis not so, in every place,
For my Son t' his disgrace,
Never rises till the Afternoon.
[52.] A Gentleman of Norfolk, as he was riding towards London in the
Winter time, and sitting by the fire side with his Host, untill supper
could be made ready, there happened a Rabbit to be at the fire a
rosting, which the Gentleman perceived to bee very leane, as he
thought. Quoth he unto his Host, We have Rabbits in our Country, that
one will drip a pottle, and baste itselfe. The In-keeper wondred with
himselfe, and did think it to be a lie, but would not say so, for
manners sake, and because he was his guest: but, thinking to requite
him, Now truely, quoth he, it is very strange: but I can tell you of
as strange a thing as that: Which the Gentleman was desirous to heare.
Quoth he, I had as fine a Grayhound as any was in England: and if I
had happened to goe abroad to my grounds, the Grayhound would alway go
with me. And sometime there would start out a Hare before me, which my
Grayhound would quickly catch. It fortuned that my dogge died, and for
very love that I bare to him, I made me a bottle of his skin, to carry
drinke withall, So, one time in hay harvest, my folkes being making of
hay in my grounds, and the weather being hot, I filled my bottle with
Beere, to carry to them, lest they should lack drink. And as I was
going along, there starts a Hare out of a bush before me: and as it
was my custome, I cryed, Now, now, now. My bottle leaping from my
girdle, ran and catcht the Hare. What, (quoth the Gentleman) me thinks
that should be a lie. Truly sir, said the In-keeper, so did I think
yours was. The Gentleman perceiving that he was requited for his
kindnesse, held himselfe contented.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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