But another being by, to fit him in his Story; and to make it appear to be truth (as you know it was) began to confirm what t'other had said, with some Oaths too. For, says he, I my self have seen that Haw thorn Tree bloom a hundred Christmas-day, and if I were to say a Hundred more, I should not lie; and I went once thither, when they were come to the Berries, which were red, large and hard; and so took some of them, and button'd me a Suit and Coat with it, as the fashion is now (for you know our fashion in England for Cloaths never alters) and when I and some others were at Church together upon Christmass day in the morning, little thinking of it, about Ten of the Clock precisely (he swore) that the branches sprung out so fast and so thick, that he was covered all over with them; insomuch that he lookt as if he had been in a Wood, and so heavy they were upon him, that he could not stir till one went out of the Church and fetcht an Axe, and cut away all the Boughs, that he might see his way out; and when they had done, he went home in this posture to his lodging; and swore also, that there was as much Wood cut off, as serv'd him all that Winter for fewel to his Chamber; but however, says he, I had rather be at the charge of the Wood than to be served so agen. But Gentlemen I tell you this to confirm what that worthy Gentleman told you before: whereas you were in doubt for a great while whether it was truth or no: but I hope there's no doubt now: and so swore it agen. [78.] One demanded of a wild yong Gentleman the reason why he would sel his land? who answered because he hoped to go to heven, which he could not possibly do til he forsook earth. Learning hath fed me, yet I know no letter, [91.] I have liv'd among books, yet am never the better: I have eaten up the Muses, yet I know not a verse, What student is this, I pray you rehearse? _Resolution_, A Worme bred in a booke. [18.] A Preacher, whose Sermons no body cared to hear, intreated a Friend of his to come to hear him. But he begged his Excuse, saying, that he was loth to disturb him in his Solitude. Another who had not the luck to please his Auditors; He did better last Year, said one. How can that be? said another, for he did not preach at all. In that very Thing he did better, reply'd the first. [17.] One told a Bakers Son, that his Father was a Knave: Truly, says he, _Though I say it, that should not say it_, my Father is as honest a man as ever lived by bread. the complaint of M. Tenter-hooke the _Proiector_, and Sir _T_homas Dodger the _Patentee_.[F. 186] [Illustration: "I have brought money to fill your Chest For which I am curst by most and least." "Ov'r many yeare a scraping is left at a clap, All thou hast gotten by others mishap." ] _If any aske, what things these_ Monsters _be, Tis a_ Projector _and a_ Patentee: _Such, as like Vermine o're this Land did crawle, And grew so rich, they gaind the Devill and all._