[61.] There were two good fellows of ancient society (who had not seen one another in a great space of tyme) that one morning very luckily met each other in _Budge Row_, and after some signes of gladnesse to meet so happily, they agreed upon a mornings draught, which lasted almost till noon, in which time they were both sufficiently liquor'd. But their bellies being fuller than their brains, they did resolve to bring up the rear of that morning's action with a Cup of Canary; away they went to the Swan Tavern at _Dowgate_, where for three hours longer they sat pecking at one another, like two Game Cocks at the end of a battaile, untill both their Eyes were in a very glimmering Condition. In the mean time, whilst they were thus toaping, there fell an exceeding violent and continuing glut of Rain, so that it flowed up to the threshold of the Tavern door, and no passenger could get over: By this time my good fellows having call'd, and paid the reckoning, they both came reeling to the door, and seeing so broad a water tumbled down _Dowgate_, one of them swore it was the Thames, and began to call a Sculler; the other being unwilling to engage further, said he would take his leave, which he did with so low a bending Complement, that his britch touching a little too hard against the stump of a post which was behind him, that it made him rebound into the middle of the stream with his head forward. The unfortunate fellow was no sooner in, but he began to stretch forth his Armes and Leggs to swim; the other which stood upon the shore, cryed out lamentably for the danger of his friend, and deploring the loss of so good a fellow, and what loss his Wife and Children would suffer in his death. But in conclusion (as the last word of Comfort) he calls out to him in these words. Dost thou hear Friend! Friend! if thou canst but Gaine _Temple Staire's_ thou wilt be safe, I warrant thee, unto which the swimming man made reply. A pox of Gaine, I do not think of Gaine, if I can but save myself, I care not. _Quidam erat._ A preaching fryar there was, who thus began, [5.] The Scripture saith there was a certaine man: A certaine man? but I do read no where, Of any certaine woman[F. 88] mention'd there: A certaine man, a phrase in Scripture common, But no place shewes there was a Certaine Woman: And fit it is, that we should ground our faith On nothing more than what the Scripture saith. [Footnote 88: This is hardly warranted by fact. See Mark xii. 42; Luke xi. 27; Luke xxiv. 22.] A fellow once said [12.] He would ne're keep his Bed, Though sick, I heard him to tell it, And his Reason was, Nay I know the Cause, For he still had a mind to Sell it.