“Now, gentlemen, I am going to carry you through the revolutions of the manual exercise, and I hope, gentlemen, you will have a little patience. I’ll be as short as possible; and I hope, gentlemen, if I should be going wrong, one of you gentlemen will be good enough to put me right again, for I mean all for the best. _Take aim! Ram down cartridge_--no, no, _fire_--I remember now, firing comes next after taking aim; but with your permission, gentlemen, I’ll _read_ the words of command.” “Oh, yes, read it, Captain, read it, that will save time.” “_’Tention_, the whole then. Please to observe, gentlemen, that at the word ‘fire,’ you _must_ fire, that is if any of your guns are loaded; and all you gentlemen fellow-soldiers, who’s armed with nothing but sticks and riding switches and cornstalks, needn’t go through the firings, but stand as you are and keep yourselves to yourselves.... _Handle cartridge!_ Pretty well, considering you done it wrong end foremost.... _Draw rammer!_ Those who have no rammers to their guns need not draw.... Handsomely done, and all together too, except that a few of you were a little too soon and some a little too late.... _Charge bagonet!_” (Some of the men) “That can’t be right, Captain. How can we charge bagonets without our guns?” “I don’t know as to that, but I know I’m right, for here it is printed, if I know how to read--it’s as plain as the nose on your--faith, I’m wrong! I’ve turned over two leaves at once. I beg your pardon, gentlemen,--we’ll not stay out long, and we’ll have something to drink as soon as we’ve done. Come, boys, get off the stumps.... _Advance arms!_ Very well done; turn stocks of your guns in front, gentlemen, and that will bring the barrels behind; and hold them straight up and down please.... Very well done, gentlemen, you have improved vastly. What a thing it is to see men under good discipline. Now, gentlemen, we come to the revolutions--but Lord, men, how _did_ you get into such a higglety-pigglety?” The fact was, the sun had come round and roasted the right wing of the veterans, and, as they were poorly provided with umbrellas, they found it convenient to follow the shade. In a vain attempt to go to war under the shadow of their own muskets, and huddling round to the left, they had changed their crescent to a pair of pothooks. The men objected to the captain’s demand for further “revolutions,” as they had already been on the ground for three-quarters of an hour, and they reminded him frequently of his promise to be as quick as he could. He might fine them if he chose, but they were thirsty and they would not go without a drink to please any captain. The dispute waxed hotter, until he settled it by sending for some grog, and the fifteen guns, ten ramrods, twelve gun-locks, three rifle-pouches and twenty-two horse-whips, walking-canes and umbrellas, fortified themselves for further exertions. The result of the next order or two was doubly groggy.