Lucy did look tired and unrefreshed, and, to speak more plainly,
very cross. Her hair, in its dryest state of pale yellow, was combed
straight back above her temples; her skin was sallow; her wrapper
carelessly put on, and its dead white unrelieved by even a bow of
ribbon at the throat. Involuntarily Lewis glanced from the uninviting
picture to his household deity, in her neat breakfast-dress of gray
silk faced with pink, her glossy hair and tranquil features, and said
to himself, in secret triumph, "Which is now the beauty? None of your
trumpery ornamental articles for me!"
Philip's eyes were as keen as his host's, and the probability is that
he instituted a similar comparison, however well his pride succeeded in
concealing the act and its result. Cutting short his wife's querulous
plaints of the discomforts of travel, and the horrors of nervous
sleeplessness, he opened a conversation with Mr. Hammond in the
subdued, perfectly-managed tones Sarah remembered so well, selecting
such topics as would interest a business man and a citizen of a
commercial metropolis. Lucy pouted, and applied herself for consolation
to her breakfast.
With a strange mingling of emotions, Sarah listened to the dialogue
between the gentlemen. She was anxious that Lewis should acquit himself
creditably. Brilliant, like Philip, he could never be; but in sterling
sense, not many men were his superiors. She had never had cause to
be ashamed of him; for one so unpretending and judicious was not
liable to make himself ridiculous. Whence, then, the solicitude with
which she hung upon his every word? her disappointment when he did
not equal the ideal reply she had fashioned, as she heard the words
that called it forth? Several times she joined in the conversation,
invariably to corroborate Lewis' assertions, or to supply something
he had omitted to state. Philip Benson was a student of human nature.
Was his mind sufficiently abstracted from his domestic annoyances to
divine the motive that Sarah herself only perceived afterwards in
solitary self-examination? Not love of, or admiration for the intrinsic
excellence of the man whose name she bore; not fear lest his modesty
should lessen his merits in the eyes of others; but a selfish dread
that his acute interlocutor, discerning in him nothing likely to
attract or win the affection of a woman such as he knew her to be,
might guess her true reason for marrying Mr. Hammond. The timorous
progeny of one guilty secret can only be numbered by the minutes during
which it is borne in the bosom. Like the fabled Lacedæmonian boy,
Sarah carried the gnawing horror with a fortitude that looked like
cheerfulness. Habit cannot lighten the weight of a clinging curse; but
strength and hardness come in time, if the burdened one is not early
crushed by his load.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account