Sarah could not have told why she revolved all this in her unquiet
mind as he sat near her, playing with their child; yet she did think
of their strange sad history, and from the review arose a feeling
of pity, sincere, almost tender for him, so worthy and so deceived.
She remembered with abasement of spirit how often she had been ready
to hate him as the instrument of her bondage; how wrathful words
had arisen to her lips at the moment of his greatest kindness; how
patiently he had borne her coldness; how unflagging was his care of
and for her. Over the dark, turbulent gulf of the unforgotten past
that sundered their hearts, she longed, as she had never done before,
to call to him, and confessing her sin against Heaven and against him,
to implore pardon for the sake of the spotless babe that smiled into
the father's face with its mother's eyes. Would he be merciful? Slowly
and emphatically memory repeated in her ear his denunciation of the
unloving wife, and courage died before the menaced curse.
"Fudge! Fiddlesticks! what frippery nonsense!" cry out, in a vehement
storm of indignation, a bevy of the Common Sense connection. "Are we
not staid and respectable matrons all? Do we not rear our daughters
virtuously, and teach our sons to honor father as well as mother? Yet
who of us troubles herself with raking in the cold ashes of her 'long
ago' for the bones of some dead and gone love--a girlish folly of
which she would be ashamed now? What cares Mr. Common Sense, among his
day-books and ledgers, in his study or in his office, how many times
his now correct helpmeet pledged eternal fidelity to other lovers
before she put her last crop of wild oats into the ground, and settled
for life with him? What if some of us, may be all, if driven hard,
should admit that when we stood up before the minister we underwent
certain qualms--call them pangs, if you like--at the thought of Tom
This, or Harry That, or Dick The Other, who, if circumstances had
permitted, we would have preferred should occupy the place of 'The
man whom we actually held by the hand!' While men can choose their
mates, and women can only take such as propose to them, these things
will happen. After all, who is hurt? You aver that none of you are,
mesdames, and we would not call your word in question. Ladies so
conscientious must, of necessity, be veracious, even in love affairs."
"I am a thoughtless animal!" said Lewis at the dinner-table. "There is
a letter from Lucy! Open it--don't mind me! I will crack your nuts for
you while you read it."
There was a troubled look in Sarah's eye when she laid it down. "Lucy
says they are certainly coming North this year--that we may look for
them in a week from the date of this. This is rather sooner than mother
expected them. Her housecleaning is late this season, in consequence of
her rheumatic spell in May."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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