"Yes," answered Berkley; "that is the waywith you all, you young men.
You see a sweet face, or a something, you know not what, and flickering
reason says, Good night; amen to common sense. The imagination invests
the beloved object with a thousand superlative charms; furnishes her
with all the purple and fine linen, all the rich apparel and furniture,
of human nature. I did the same when I was young. I was once as
desperately in love as you are now; and went through all the
'Delicious deaths, soft exhalations
Of soul; dear and divine annihilations,
A thousand unknown rites
Of joys, and rarified delights.'
I adored and was rejected. 'You are in love with certain attributes,'
said the lady. 'Damn your attributes, Madam,' said I; 'I know nothing
of attributes.' 'Sir,' said she, with dignity, 'you have been
drinking.' So we parted. She was married afterwards to another, who
knew something about attributes, I suppose. I have seen her once since,
and only once. She had a baby in a yellow gown. I hate a baby in a
yellow gown. How glad I am she did not marry me. One of these days, you
will be glad you have been rejected. Take my word for it."
"All that does not prevent my lot from being a very melancholy one!"
said Flemming sadly.
"O, never mind the lot," cried Berkley laughing, "so long as you don't
get Lot's wife. If the cucumber is bitter, throw it away, as the
philosopher Marcus Antoninus says, in his Meditations. Forget her, and
all will be as if you had not known her."
"I shall never forget her," replied Flemming, rather solemnly. "Not my
pride, but my affections, are wounded; and the wound is too deep ever
to heal. I shall carry it with me always. I enter no more into the
world, but will dwell only in the world of my own thoughts. All great
and unusual occurrences, whether of joy or sorrow, lift us above this
earth; and we should do well always to preserve this elevation.
Hitherto I have not done so. But now I will no more descend; I will sit
apart and above the world, with my mournful, yet holy thoughts."
"Whew! You had better go into society; the whirl and delirium will cure
you in a week. If you find a lady, who pleases you very much, and you
wish to marry her, and she will not listen to such a horrid thing, I
see but one remedy, which is to find another, who pleases you more, and
who will listen to it."
"No, my friend; you do not understand my character," said Flemming,
shaking his head. "I love this woman with a deep, and lasting
affection. I shall never cease to love her. This may be madness in me;
but so it is. Alas and alas! Paracelsus of old wasted life in trying to
discover its elixir, which after all turned out to be alcohol; and
instead of being made immortal upon earth, he died drunk on the floor
of a tavern. The like happens to many of us. We waste our best years in
distilling the sweetest flowers of life into love-potions, which after
all do not immortalize, butonly intoxicate us. By Heaven! we are all of
us mad."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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