Lesbians -- Fiction; Love stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction
“Marcie and Beebo look about as much alike as Laurel and Hardy. Yet they
both remind you of Beth.”
“But that doesn’t mean—”
“And you fell for both of them. And don’t tell me they were the only
ones.” His eyes were hard to meet. Laura looked down.
She shook her head. “No,” she whispered, confused, rubbing her eyes.
“No.”
“Beth must have been a great girl, Mother. But you can’t stay in love
with her all of your life. Even if she _was_ the first one.” Laura’s
face flushed.
“I won’t talk about this, Jack!” she exclaimed.
“You don’t have to. I will.”
“It’s _my_ private life.”
“You’ve pulled me into it. What’s the matter, are you afraid to hear me
talk about it?”
She sat down, angry. “No,” she said sharply. “I’m not afraid.”
Jack took a sip of his café royale. “Okay,” he said in a business-like
voice. “I’m going to tell you something you won’t like. But I think you
ought to know it. You were never in love with Marcie, Laura.”
They looked at each other and finally Laura exploded, “You’re cracked! I
thought you understood. I thought you—_you_, of all people—understood
how I felt about her!”
“I did.”
“I don’t want to hear any more!”
“I don’t doubt it,” he said. She rose again and faced him, defiant and
hurt. “You loved Beth,” he said, more gently. “You loved love. It showed
in all you said to me, when we first met. You needed love and you went
looking for it. You went looking for another Beth. You were bound to
find her. You found her in every female face that appealed to you.
“Laura,” Jack said slowly. “Marcie doesn’t look like Beth. Neither does
Beebo. Nobody looks like Beth but Beth. And Beth is gone. She isn’t
yours any more. She belongs to a man.”
Laura covered her face suddenly with a groan. “Jack, don’t! Please,” she
whimpered. Then, gathering her anger around her, she said, “They _do_
look like her! I swear they do!”
Jack shook his head. “They just looked like love, Mother.”
Laura gave a little sob. “Jack, don’t torture me.”
“You know why I’m doing it. You know I don’t want to hurt you. Now
listen to me, Laura. You can’t stay in love with Beth all your life.”
Laura put her hands down and looked at him again. “Jack, you don’t know
how wonderful she was. You never knew her, you can’t talk about her. She
was so beautiful, she was so good to me. She made me understand what I
was, when I was so ignorant and scared that you wouldn’t believe it! And
she made me understand without hurting me. She made it beautiful. I owe
her so much. I loved her so.”
“But she’s married, Laura. You told me that yourself. You’ll never even
see her again. No matter how good she was.”
“She never hurt me!” Laura flared. “Marcie hurt me, Beebo hurt me, but
never Beth.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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