"Ah, yes!" she answered, "but I have not gone down. I must obey my own
conscience, not yours; and my conscience tells me the thing is right
which you hold to be wrong. I am quite willing to believe it would be
wrong for you, but for me it is clearly right. You said the other day
he had lowered me. What a fiction that is! In what have I changed for
the worse? Do I fail in any duty of life since I knew him in which I
previously succeeded? Oh, no! he has not lowered me! Love like this
rounds a life and brings it to perfection; it could not wreck it."
"But, Ideala, you are going to fail in a duty; you are going to fail in
the most important duty of your life--your duty to society."
"I owe nothing to society," she answered, obstinately.
"I have always admired you," I pursued, "for not letting your own
experience warp your judgment. Oh, what a falling-off is here! I have
heard you wish to be something more than an independent unit of which
no account need be taken. How can we, any of us, say we owe nothing to
society, when we owe every pleasure in life to it? Do we owe nothing to
those who have gone before, and whom we have to thank for the music,
the painting, the poetry, and all the arts which would leave a big
blank in _your_ life, Ideala, if they ceased to exist? You would
have been a mere savage now, without refinement enough to appreciate
that rose at your waistbelt, but for the labour and self-denial which
the hundreds and thousands who lived, and loved, and suffered in order
to make you what you are have bestowed on you, and on all of us. You
would not say, if you thought a moment, that society had done nothing
for you; and no one can honestly think that they owe it nothing in
return. It seems to me that a rigid observance of the laws which hold
society together, and make life possible for all of us, and pleasant
for some, is the least we can do; and do you know, Ideala, when a woman
ever thinks of doing what you propose to do, she has already gone down
to a low depth--of ingratitude, if of nothing else."
"I do not propose to do anything that will injure any one," she
answered, coldly. "I am free, am I not, to dispose of myself as I like
--to give myself to whomsoever I please?"
"We are none of us free in that sense of the word," I replied.
"All are but parts of one stupendous whole
Whose body Nature is, and God the soul.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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