If Winter ComesHutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
General
If Winter Comes
Hutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
Fiction
He thought, "Tybar--Tybar.--They're just alike in their way of saying
things, Nona and Tybar. That bantering way they talk when they're
together--when they're together. Tybar does, whoever he's with. Not
Nona. Not with me. But with Tybar. She plays up to him when they're
together. And he plays up to her. Everybody says how amusing they are.
They're perfectly suited. They look so dashed handsome, the pair of
them. And always that bantering talk. Nona chose deliberately between
Tybar and me. I know she did. She loved me, till he came along. It's
old. Ten years old. I can look at it. She chose deliberately. I can see
her choosing: 'Tybar or Marko?--oh, dash it, Tybar.' And she chose
right. She's just his mate. He's just her mate. They're a pair. That
bantering, airy way of theirs together. That's just characteristic of
the oneness of their characters. I couldn't put up that bantering sort
of stuff. I never could. I'm a jolly sight too serious. And Nona knew
it. She used to laugh at me about it. She still does. 'You puzzle, don't
you, Marko?' she said this very morning."
He thought, "No, that wasn't laughing at me. Not that. No, it wasn't.
Not that--nor any of it. What did she mean when she said 'There!' like
that when she gave me her hand when she first came in? And took off her
glove first. What did she mean when she said she had to come? 'Well, I
had to come,' she said.--What did she mean when she said she was
flotsam?--_Flotsam_! Why? Made me angry in my voice when I asked her. I
said, 'How can you be flotsam?' And how the devil can she?--Nona, with
Tybar, flotsam? But she said it. I said, 'How can you be flotsam, the
life you've--taken?' I didn't mean to say 'taken' like that. I meant to
have said 'the life you've got, you live.' But I meant taken, chosen.
She did take it, deliberately. She chose between us. I might almost have
heard her choose 'Marko or Tybar? Oh, dash it--Tybar.' I never
reproached her, not by a look. I saw her point of view. My infernal
failing, even then. Not by a look I ever reproached her. I thought I'd
forgotten it, absolutely. But I haven't. It came out in that moment that
I haven't. 'The life you've--taken!' I meant it to sting. Damn me, it
did sting. That look she gave! As if I had struck her.--What rot! How
could it sting her? How could she mind? Only if she regretted.--Is it
_likely_?"
He thought, "But _is_ she happy? Is it all what it appears between them?
That remark she made to that woman and the extraordinary way she said
it. 'You never forget you're married, do you?' Amazing thing to say, the
way she said it. What did she mean? And that woman. She said something
like, 'Nor you, do you?' and looked at me and then at Tybar. And Tybar
looked--at Nona, at me, as if he'd got some joke, some mock...."
He thought, "What rot! She chose. She knew he was her sort. She knew I
wasn't. She chose deliberately...."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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