Most persons, one supposes, have with more or less distinct
consciousness framed a notion of their own value, if not to the world
generally, at least to themselves. And this notion, however undefined it
may be, is held to with a singular tenacity of belief. The greater part
of mankind, indeed, seem never to entertain the question whether they
really possess points of excellence. They assume it as a matter
perfectly self-evident, and appear to believe in their vaguely conceived
worth on the same immediate testimony of consciousness by which they
assure themselves of their personal existence. Indeed, the conviction of
personal consequence may be said to be a constant factor in most men's
consciousness. However restrained by the rules of polite intercourse, it
betrays its existence and its energy in innumerable ways. It displays
itself most triumphantly when the mind is suddenly isolated from other
minds, when other men unite in heaping neglect and contempt on the
believer's head. In these moments he proves an almost heroic strength of
confidence, believing in himself and in his claims to careful
consideration when all his acquaintance are practically avowing their
disbelief.
The intensity of this belief in personal value may be observed in very
different forms. The young woman who, quite independently of others'
opinion, and even in defiance of it, cherishes a conviction that her
external attractions have a considerable value; the young man who, in
the face of general indifference, persists in his habit of voluble talk
on the supposition that he is conferring on his fellow-creatures the
fruits of profound wisdom; and the man of years whose opinion of his own
social importance and moral worth is quite disproportionate to the
estimation which others form of his claims--these alike illustrate the
force and pertinacity of the belief.
There are, no doubt, many exceptions to this form of self-appreciation.
In certain robust minds, but little given to self-reflection, the idea
of personal value rarely occurs. And then there are timid, sensitive
natures that betray a tendency to self-distrust of all kinds, and to an
undue depreciation of personal merit. Yet even here traces of an impulse
to think well of self will appear to the attentive eye, and one can
generally recognize that this impulse is only kept down by some other
stronger force, as, for example, extreme sensitiveness to the judgment
of others, great conscientiousness, and so on. And however this be, it
will be allowed that the average man rates himself highly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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