No doubt he had said things to her that a gentleman does not say to a
lady, that hardly any man would say to any woman. He was startled to
remember what he had said to her. He abhorred the thought of such
things coming from his lips--and to the mother of his children. But the
blame for these atrocities was also hers. She had driven him frantic;
she would have driven a less-dignified man to violence, to blows,
perhaps. And she had had the effrontery to blame him for driving her
frantic when it was she that drove him.
Finally they had stormed themselves out, squandered their vocabularies
of abuse, and taken resort to silence in a pretended dignity. That is,
she had done this. He had relapsed into silence because he realized how
impervious to truth or justice she was. Facts she would not deal in.
Logic she abhorred. Reasoning infuriated her.
And then in grim, mutual contempt they had crept into bed and lain as
far apart as they could. He would have gone into another room, but she
would have thought he was afraid to hear more of her. Or she would have
come knocking at the door and lured him back only to renew the war at
some appeal of his to that sense of justice he was forever hoping to
find in her soul.
He was aligned now along the very edge of the mattress. It was childish
of her to behave so spitefully, but what could he do except repay her in
kind? She would not have understood any other behavior. She had turned
her back on him, too, and stretched herself as thin as she could as
close to the edge as she could lie without falling out.
What a vixen she was! And at this time of all when she should have been
gentle, soothing. Even if she had thought him wrong and misinterpreted
his natural vehemence as virulence, she should have been patient. What
was a wife for but to be a helpmeet? She knew how easily his temper was
assuaged, she knew the very words. Why had she avoided them?
And she was to blame for so many of his problems. Her bills and her
children's bills were increasing. She took so much of his time. She
needed so much entertaining, so much waiting on, so much listening to.
Neither she nor the children produced. They simply spent. In a crisis
they never gave help, but exacted it.
In business, as in a shipwreck, strong and useful men must step back and
sacrifice themselves that the women and children might be saved--for
other men to take care of. And what frauds these women were! All
allurement and gentleness till they had entrapped their victims, then
fiends of exaction, without sympathy for the big work of men, without
interest in the world's problems, alert to ridiculous suspicions,
reckless with accusations, incapable of equity, and impatient of
everything important.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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