It grew lighter. Kallem could not sleep, and at last could not remain
at home. In fear, greater than he would own to his brother-in-law, he
went in and out of the rooms, up and down as though the house were to
be searched. For it was true enough that he too had both judged and
condemned.
His sister had always been fonder of him than he of her. That time they
had danced together last winter he could tell that her love for him had
not diminished. Yes, even when he struck her--had she not come then to
do him good? Her attack on Ragni that time----of course there was more
than dogmatical narrow-mindedness in it--it was jealousy! Jealousy
because he had become all in all to Ragni and was nothing to her. He
could have brought those two women together; it was impossible to doubt
that. Had he tried to do that?
The more he thought of it, the less right he had to be severe; for he
was guilty too! His sister's great eyes, as he had seen them last
evening, were resting on him now in her direst need, they seemed to
gaze full at him. All her life long, confused and shy, when not carried
away by passion, hampered by unnatural doctrines and defiant in her
truthfulness--she had looked out for him, from year to month, from week
to day. Then he came and had cast her off. Cast her off for one who
was not worthy of him--so it seemed to her.
Poor, poor Josephine! He had thus never been anything for her, had only
harmed her, and yet she in her faithfulness had always longed for him.
The rooms became oppressive and he felt afraid; he must go out and look
for her. It was getting lighter and lighter and with the feeling that
morning was near, he threw open the veranda doors; but he had nothing
to do out there; on the contrary he would have to shut them again if he
were really going out. So he stepped out to close them again and in
doing so glanced on one side--and there, sheltered from the north wind
by the veranda, sitting on Ragni's bench just under his office windows,
was Josephine, with her shawl over her knees. She saw him and crouched
down like a wounded bird, which cannot move away, yet must not be seen.
And yet she was sitting there just to be seen. There was nowhere else
she could be, for she had tried. He hurried down the steps toward her.
Then she trembled:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account