"Angelica!" he cried, eagerly, approaching to seize her hand, which,
however, she instantly drew back. "Why do you speak this way, if you
will not make me happy--if you will not even let me kiss your hand? No,
I won't be kept from speaking any longer; for, no matter how much about
my bad qualities you may still have on your conscience, you can
no longer deny that you like me, that you think well of me; and
that is the main thing and a thousand times better than I ever dared
to hope. Dearest, best Angelica, only try and believe that even a
thirty-one-year-old battle-painter can improve. I will stop up my flute
with lead, I will give my mice strychnine in a piece of Swiss cheese,
and will wear a covering over my nose so that the children shall run
away at sight of me. And, finally, in regard to my love-affairs--do you
really believe I am so wanting in taste, to say nothing of all nobler
motives, as to have eyes for such every-day doll-faces, after having
found in your countenance the image of all love and goodness, of all
wisdom and grace?"
In the mean while he got possession of one of her hands and pressed
it so earnestly, at the same time gazing into her face with such
true-hearted, mischievous eyes, that she grew quite red and came very
near losing her firmness. However, she quickly recovered herself again
and said:
"You are a truly dangerous man, Rosenbusch. I begin to realize that now
from my own experience. If I did not call to my aid all the little
sense and self-consciousness I possess, we should now fall into one
another's arms, and ruin would take its course. One more name would
stand on your list; you would go to the war, and there, in the great
events that go to make up the history of the world, you would find the
very best excuse for letting this little affair of the heart drop
completely out of your memory. No, my friend, I think too much of
myself for that. I confidently believe that my respected person has
merely become of importance in your eyes, because I have heretofore
withstood your amiability in a perfectly incomprehensible way. As soon
as you should become convinced that I too am only a weak woman, I
should become a matter of great indifference to you. Now, it is true,
my stupid honesty has prevented me from concealing this from you; but I
don't regard myself as hopelessly lost even yet. Now, if you go to the
war, we shall both be equally well off. We shall both have ample time
and opportunity for forgetting one another. I, to be sure, here alone
in this deathly quiet house, where I hear nothing but the squeak of
your mice--I shall have somewhat the harder time. But perhaps some
other dangerous youth will move into your quarters--a dark-complexioned
Hungarian or Pole--I have always had a partiality for brunettes, and
for that reason alone it is a great mistake for me to love you with
your red beard."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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