I may explain now, in advance of my story, what I came to learn long
afterward; namely, that the poor little maiden was truly in sore distress
at this time--torn by the conflict between her inclination and her
judgment, between her heart and her head. She was, in fact, hesitating
between the glamour which the young Englishman and Lady Berenicia, with
their polished ways, their glistening surfaces, and their attractive,
idlers' views of existence, had thrown over her, and her own innate,
womanly repugnance to the shallowness and indulgence, not to say license,
beneath it all. It was this battle the progress of which I unwittingly
watched. Had I but known what emotions were fighting for mastery behind
those sweetly grave hazel eyes--had I but realized how slight a pressure
might have tipped the scales my way--how much would have been different!
But I, slow Frisian that I was, comprehended nothing of it all, and so was
by turns futilely compassionate--and sulky.
For again, at intervals, she would be as gay and bright as a June rose,
tripping up and down through the house with a song on her lips, and the
old laugh rippling like sunbeams about her. Then she would deftly perch
herself on the arm of Mr. Stewart's chair, and dazzle us both with the
joyous merriment of her talk, and the sparkle in her eyes--or sing for us
of an evening, up-stairs, playing the while upon the lute (which young
Cross had given her) instead of the discarded piano. Then she would wear a
bunch of flowers--I never suspecting whence they came--upon her breast,
and an extra ribbon in her hair. And then I would be wretched, and
gloomily say to myself that I preferred her unhappy, and next morning,
when the cloud had gathered afresh upon her face, would long again to see
her cheerful once more.
And so the week went by miserably, and I did not tell my love.
One morning, after breakfast, Mr. Stewart asked Daisy to what conclusion
she had come about our accepting Philip Cross's invitation to join a
luncheon-party on his estate that day. I had heard this gathering
mentioned several times before, as a forthcoming event of great promise,
and I did not quite understand either the reluctance with which Daisy
seemed to regard the thought of going, or the old gentleman's mingled
insistence and deference to her wishes in the matter.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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