In Trust: The Story of a Lady and Her LoverOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
General
In Trust: The Story of a Lady and Her Lover
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Fiction
‘I am sure,’ said Rose, beginning to cry, ‘you need not speak--it is you
that refused to do what he told you, not I? This is quite innocent; what
could it matter? It can’t vex him now, whatever we do, for he will
never know. I would not have disobeyed him when he was living--that is,
not in anything serious, not for the world--but now, what can it matter,
when he will never, never know?’
The utter scepticism and cynicism of the little childish creature,
crying by the fire, did not strike Anne. It was only a naughtiness, a
foolishness upon the child’s part, nothing more. She restored the packet
to the private drawer and locked it with energy, closing down and
locking the desk, too. It was herself she blamed for having shown the
packet, not Rose, who knew no better. But now it was clear that she must
do, what indeed she generally had to do, when Rose claimed her
attention--give up her own occupation, and devote herself to her sister.
She came and sat down by her, leaving the letter in which her heart was.
And Rose, taking advantage of the opportunity, tormented her with
questions. When at last she consented to retire to her room, Anne could
do nothing but sit by the fire, making a vain attempt to stifle the more
serious questions, which were arising, whether she would or no, in her
own heart. ‘Rose = prose,’ she had tried hard to say to herself, as so
often before; but her lips quivered, so that a smile was impossible. She
sat there for a long time after, trying to recover herself. She had
arrived at a crisis of which she felt the pain without understanding the
gravity of it. And indeed the sudden chaos of confusion and wonder into
which she had wandered, she could not tell how, had no doubt so deadened
the blow of the strange will to her, as to give her a heroism which was
half stupidity, as so many heroisms are. She, too, had expected, like
all the world, that Cosmo would have come to her at once--if not to
Mount, yet to the rectory, where his friends would have received him.
She had taken it for granted--though she had not said a word on the
subject to anyone, nor even to herself, feeling that to see him and
feel him near her would be all the greater consolation if she had never
said she looked for it, even in her own heart. She had not given his
name to Charley Ashley as one of those to be informed by telegraph, nor
had she mentioned his name at all, though she seemed to herself to read
it in a continual question in the Curate’s eyes. A chill had stolen over
her when she heard nothing of him all the first long day. She had not
permitted herself to ask or to think, but she had started at every
opening door, and listened to every step outside, and even, with a pang
which she would not acknowledge, had looked out through a crevice of the
closed shutters, with an ache of wondering anguish in her heart, to see
the Curate coming up the avenue alone on the second morning. But when
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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