Incidents of the War: Humorous, Pathetic, and DescriptiveBurnett, Alfred
History
Incidents of the War: Humorous, Pathetic, and Descriptive
Burnett, Alfred
United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Anecdotes
"Whar the whang-doodle mourneth for its first-born." This part of the
tex, my brethering, is another figger of speech, and isn't to be taken
as it says. It doesn't mean the howlin' wilderness whar John the
Hard-shell Baptist was fed on locusts and wild asses; but it means, my
brethering, the city of New Yorleans, whar corn is worth six bits a
bushel one day, and nary red the next; whar gamblers, thieves, and
pickpockets go skiting about the streets like weasels in a barnyard;
whar they have cream-colored hosses, gilded carriages, marble saloons
with brandy and sugar in 'em; whar honest men are scarcer than hens'
teeth; and whar a strange woman once tuk in your beluved preacher, and
bamboozled him out of two hundred and twenty-seven dollars; but she
can't do it again, hallelujah! For "they shall gnaw a file, and flee
unto the mountains of Hepsidam, whar the lion roareth and the
whang-doodle mourneth for its first-born."
Brother Flint will please pass round the hat, and let every Hard-shell
shell out.
THE END.
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