‘Excuse me--I was just going in--to telephone,’ I explained. And she
sidled off, murmuring apologies, but opening the door for me while she
did so. Our hands met a moment on the handle. There was a second’s
awkwardness--it was so stupid. I remembered her injury, and by way of
something to say, I enquired after it. She thanked me; it was entirely
healed now, but it might have been much worse; and there was something
about the ‘mercy of the Lord’ that I didn’t quite catch. While
telephoning, however--a London call, and my attention focused on it--I
realised sharply that this was the first time I had spoken with her;
also, that I had--touched her.
It happened to be a Sunday, and the lines were clear. I got my
connection quickly, and the incident was forgotten while my thoughts
went up to London. On my way upstairs, then, the woman came back into
my mind, so that I recalled other things about her--how she seemed all
over the house, in unlikely places often; how I had caught her sitting
in the hall alone that night; how she was for ever coming and going
with her lugubrious visage and that untidy hair at the back that had
made me laugh three years ago with the idea that it looked singed or
burnt; and how the impression on my first arrival at The Towers was
that this woman somehow kept alive, though its evidence was outwardly
suppressed, the influence of her late employer and of his sombre
teachings. Somewhere with her was associated the idea of punishment,
vindictiveness, revenge. I remembered again suddenly my odd notion that
she sought to keep her present mistress here, a prisoner in this bleak
and comfortless house, and that really, in spite of her obsequious
silence, she was intensely opposed to the change of thought that had
reclaimed Mabel to a happier view of life.
All this in a passing second flashed in review before me, and I
discovered, or at any rate reconstructed, the real Mrs. Marsh. She
was decidedly in the Shadow. More, she stood in the forefront of it,
stealthily leading an assault, as it were, against The Towers and
its occupants, as though, consciously or unconsciously, she laboured
incessantly to this hateful end.
I can only judge that some state of nervousness in me permitted the
series of insignificant thoughts to assume this dramatic shape, and
that what had gone before prepared the way and led her up at the head
of so formidable a procession. I relate it exactly as it came to me.
My nerves were doubtless somewhat on edge by now. Otherwise I should
hardly have been a prey to the exaggeration at all. I seemed open to so
many strange impressions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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