India, Its Life and ThoughtJones, John P. (John Peter)
Religion
India, Its Life and Thought
Jones, John P. (John Peter)
India -- Civilization; India -- Religion; Missions -- India
Marriage among Hindus differs in many respects from the same compact
among western people. It is in no instance dependent upon the
initiative of the contracting parties, if such the bride and the
bridegroom may be called in India. Neither of them is a direct
participant in the arranging of the contract. It is all done by the
parents or the guardians of the boy and girl. It is entirely a
business, and not a sentimental, affair. No other system would be
possible under past and present conditions in India. In the case of
infant marriages, the children concerned have, of course, neither
knowledge of, nor special interest in, the matter. Even in cases where
the future bride and bridegroom have attained puberty, no sentiment is
ever allowed to enter, as a consideration, into the matter. The first
question asked is whether the parties belong to the same caste and are
connected by family ties. If so, the marriage may be a suitable one.
It is strange that the children of brothers and sisters furnish the
most suitable marriage relationships. But the children of brothers, or
those of sisters, furnish a prohibited relationship! It is regarded as
improper for a boy to marry the daughter of his mother's sister, or of
his father's brother, as it would be to marry his own sister. The
marriage of those remotely connected by blood is rarely considered;
the marriage of those not at all connected by blood relationship,
never.
The next matter of paramount importance is a consideration of the
horoscope of the parties. Were the boy and girl born under
astrological conditions which harmonize; or does her horoscope so
conflict with his that their dissonance would bring evil and misery to
the family? In the latter case, a marriage will be impossible, even
though all other conditions are most inviting.
Then follows the question of dowry; and here comes the great struggle.
The girl's parents have to furnish, with the bride, a considerable
dowry, whose size is directly related to the affluence of the boy's
family, or to his education and prospects in life. The bickerings
which take place in this matter are most unseemly; and the marriage
compact is degraded into a sordid, mercenary transaction. Fathers of
girls involve themselves in debts which they can never clear, in order
to marry their darlings to sons of high families of good connection.
It is this difficulty of marrying daughters, save at an intolerable
expense to the family, which largely accounts for the universal and
keen disappointment of Hindu families when they discover, at
childbirth, that a daughter, and not a son, has been born.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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