"She grows prettier every day," she thought--"But not happier, I
fear!--not happier, poor child!"
Innocent meanwhile, upstairs in her own little study, was reading and
re-reading a brief letter which had come for her by the same post that
had delivered the Duchess's invitation.
"I hear you are among the guests invited to the Duchess of Deanshire's
party," it ran--"I hope you will go--for the purely selfish reason that
I want to meet you there. Hers is a great house with plenty of room,
and a fine garden--for London. People crowd to her 'crushes', but one
can always escape the mob. I have seen so little of you lately, and you
are now so famous that I shall think myself lucky if I may touch the
hem of your garment. Will you encourage me thus far? Like Hamlet, 'I
lack advancement'! When will you take me to Briar Farm? I should like
to see the tomb of my very ancestral uncle--could we not arrange a
day's outing in the country while the weather is fine? I throw myself
on your consideration and clemency for this--and for many other
unwritten things!
Yours,
AMADIS DE JOCELYN."
There was nothing in this easily worded scrawl to make an ordinarily
normal heart beat faster, yet the heart of this simple child of the
gods, gifted with genius and deprived of worldly wisdom as all such
divine children are, throbbed uneasily, and her eyes were wet. More
than this, she touched the signature,--the long-familiar name--with her
soft lips,--and as though afraid of what she had done, hurriedly folded
the letter and locked it away.
Then she sat down and thought. Nearly two years had elapsed since she
had left Briar Farm, and in that short time she had made the name she
had adopted famous. She could not call it her own name; born out of
wedlock, she had no right, by the stupid law, to the name of her
father. She could, legally, have worn the maiden name of her mother had
she known it--but she did not know it. And what she was thinking of
now, was this: Should she tell her lately discovered second "Amadis de
Jocelyn" the true story of her birth and parentage at this, the outset
of their friendship, before--well, before it went any further? She
could not consult Miss Leigh on the point, without smirching the
reputation of Pierce Armitage, the man whose memory was enshrined in
that dear lady's heart as a thing of unsullied honour. She puzzled
herself over the question for a long time, and then decided to keep her
own counsel.
"After all, why should I tell him?" she asked herself. "It might make
trouble--he is so proud of his lineage, and I too am proud of it for
him! ... why should I let him know that I inherit nothing but my
mother's shame!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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