I held up my hand as a mute appeal against such a proceeding so early
in the day; but on lowering it again I found that I almost
involuntarily closed my fingers round the tumbler which my adviser had
pressed upon me. I drank the contents hastily off, lest any one should
come in upon us and set me down as a toper. After all, there was
something very amusing about the young fellow's eccentricities.
"Not spirits," I explained, smilingly; "an apparition--a ghost. If
such a thing is to be had, I should be very willing to negotiate."
"A ghost for Goresthorpe Grange?" inquired Mr. Brocket with as much
coolness as if I had asked for a drawing-room suite.
"Quite so," I answered.
"Easiest thing in the world," said my companion, filling up my glass
again in spite of my remonstrance. "Let us see!" Here he took down a
large red note-book, with all the letters of the alphabet in a fringe
down the edge. "A ghost you said, didn't you. That's G.
G--gems--gimlets--gaspipes--gauntlets--guns--galleys. Ah, here we are!
Ghosts. Volume nine, section six, page forty-one. Excuse me!" And
Jack ran up a ladder and began rummaging among a pile of ledgers on a
high shelf. I felt half inclined to empty my glass into the spittoon
when his back was turned; but on second thoughts I disposed of it in a
legitimate way.
"Here it is!" cried my London agent, jumping off the ladder with a
crash, and depositing an enormous volume of manuscript upon the table.
"I have all these things tabulated, so that I may lay my hands upon
them in a moment. It's all right--it's quite weak" (here he filled our
glasses again). "What were we looking up, again?"
"Ghosts," I suggested.
"Of course; page 41. Here we are. 'J. H. Fowler & Son, Dunkel Street,
suppliers of mediums to the nobility and gentry; charms
sold--love-philters--mummies--horoscopes cast.' Nothing in your line
there, I suppose?"
I shook my head despondingly.
"Frederick Tabb," continued my wife's cousin, "sole channel of
communication between the living and the dead. Proprietor of the
spirits of Byron, Kirke White, Grimaldi, Tom Cribb, and Inigo Jones.
That's about the figure!"
"Nothing romantic enough there," I objected. "Good heavens! Fancy a
ghost with a black eye and a handkerchief tied round its waist, or
turning somersaults, and saying, 'How are you to-morrow?'" The very
idea made me so warm that I emptied my glass and filled it again.
"Here is another," said my companion, "'Christopher McCarthy; bi-weekly
séances--attended by all the eminent spirits of ancient and modern
times. Nativities--charms--abracadabras, messages from the dead.' He
might be able to help us. However, I shall have a hunt round myself
to-morrow, and see some of these fellows. I know their haunts, and
it's odd if I can't pick up something cheap. So there's an end of
business," he concluded, hurling the ledger into the corner; "and now
we'll have something to drink."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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