It was a Lover and His LassOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
General
It was a Lover and His Lass
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Scotland -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Miss Margaret was very stately in this party. She saw through it,
and was indignant with Jean and Lilias for enjoying themselves. Two
or three engagements sprang out of it, very pleasant, but somewhat
humiliating to the head of the family, who had come to London in order
to be beyond the country, and give Lilias experience of the great
world. There were two or three little dinners, one in a hotel, and
the others in other lodgings of similar character to those in Cadogan
Place, and many proposals that they should go to the play together,
and to the Royal Academy to see the pictures, proposals which it
was all Margaret could do to prevent the others from accepting. She
gave a couple of little parties herself to the rural notables. But
all these did not count, they only kept her out of society, in the
true sense of the word. Margaret was as proud a woman as ever bore a
Scottish name, which is saying much; but it seemed to her that she
would almost have stooped to a meanness to get an entry into the upper
world which she felt to be circling just out of her reach, and from
which now and then she heard echoes dropping into the lower spheres.
It was not for herself she desired that entry. And almost wrathful
contempt grew upon her as she heard the chatter of society, the evil
tales, the coterie gossip, the inane vulgarities which, to a visionary
from the country expecting great things, made the first impression
of town in many cases the most distressful of disappointments. For
herself, she longed for the serene quiet which, if it was sometimes
dull, was at least always innocent, and where the routine of every day
contented the harmless mind. Here an uneasy discontent, an ambition
which she felt humiliating, a constant strain of anxiety which was
mean and contemptible, filled her being. She wanted to know people
who had no claim upon human approbation but that of knowing a great
many other people and giving parties. She was unhappy because she
was not acquainted with ladies in the fashionable world, and men who
went everywhere. When Jean and Lilias, seated upon chairs by her side
looking on at the passing crowds of Vanity Fair in Rotten Row with all
the delight of people from the country, saw and hailed and exchanged
joyous greetings with other people from the country passing by,
Margaret's soul was filled with irritation and annoyance. These were
not the acquaintances she desired. It vexed her to be exposed to their
cordiality, their pleasure at sight of anybody they knew. Jean too
was delighted to perceive in the crowd what she called "a kent face;"
but Margaret's heart was wrung with envy, with unsatisfied wishes,
and with a profound contempt for herself which underlay all these.
She took the greatest trouble, however, to find out people of any
pretensions to fashion whom she had ever known, to recall herself to
their recollection, she who at home considered it her due to be courted
and sought out by others.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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