England -- Fiction; Experimental fiction; Psychological fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- England -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
And isn't it pleasant, Fanny went on thinking, how young men bring out
lots of silver coins from their trouser pockets, and look at them,
instead of having just so many in a purse?
Then there she was herself, whirling across the stage in white flounces,
and the music was the dance and fling of her own soul, and the whole
machinery, rock and gear of the world was spun smoothly into those swift
eddies and falls, she felt, as she stood rigid leaning over the barrier
two feet from Jacob Flanders.
Her screwed-up black glove dropped to the floor. When Jacob gave it her,
she started angrily. For never was there a more irrational passion. And
Jacob was afraid of her for a moment--so violent, so dangerous is it
when young women stand rigid; grasp the barrier; fall in love.
It was the middle of February. The roofs of Hampstead Garden Suburb lay
in a tremulous haze. It was too hot to walk. A dog barked, barked,
barked down in the hollow. The liquid shadows went over the plain.
The body after long illness is languid, passive, receptive of sweetness,
but too weak to contain it. The tears well and fall as the dog barks in
the hollow, the children skim after hoops, the country darkens and
brightens. Beyond a veil it seems. Ah, but draw the veil thicker lest I
faint with sweetness, Fanny Elmer sighed, as she sat on a bench in
Judges Walk looking at Hampstead Garden Suburb. But the dog went on
barking. The motor cars hooted on the road. She heard a far-away rush
and humming. Agitation was at her heart. Up she got and walked. The
grass was freshly green; the sun hot. All round the pond children were
stooping to launch little boats; or were drawn back screaming by their
nurses.
At mid-day young women walk out into the air. All the men are busy in
the town. They stand by the edge of the blue pond. The fresh wind
scatters the children's voices all about. My children, thought Fanny
Elmer. The women stand round the pond, beating off great prancing shaggy
dogs. Gently the baby is rocked in the perambulator. The eyes of all the
nurses, mothers, and wandering women are a little glazed, absorbed. They
gently nod instead of answering when the little boys tug at their
skirts, begging them to move on.
And Fanny moved, hearing some cry--a workman's whistle perhaps--high in
mid-air. Now, among the trees, it was the thrush trilling out into the
warm air a flutter of jubilation, but fear seemed to spur him, Fanny
thought; as if he too were anxious with such joy at his heart--as if he
were watched as he sang, and pressed by tumult to sing. There! Restless,
he flew to the next tree. She heard his song more faintly. Beyond it was
the humming of the wheels and the wind rushing.
She spent tenpence on lunch.
"Dear, miss, she's left her umbrella," grumbled the mottled woman in the
glass box near the door at the Express Dairy Company's shop.
"Perhaps I'll catch her," answered Milly Edwards, the waitress with the
pale plaits of hair; and she dashed through the door.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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