Country homes -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
Jane looked at Athena without speaking; she was telling herself that Hew
could not help being enthralled--that no man could have helped it. She
had never seen her friend look as lovely as she looked to-night; and
there was a pathetic, a very appealing expression on the beautiful face
now bending over her.
Mrs. Maule kissed Jane Oglander.
Then she straightened herself.
"I can't sleep because I keep thinking of all you told me this morning,"
she said at last. "I know you don't want to talk about it, and yet--and
yet I feel I must tell you that what you told me is making me wretched,
Jane. Are you sure that you really wish to break off your engagement?"
Jane was very pale; she was spent with suffering, and yet, as Athena saw
with a pang of envy, she looked very young; her fair hair lay in two
long thick plaits, one on each side of her face. It was that perhaps
which made her look so young, so placid--so defenceless.
"It seems to me the only thing I can do," she spoke in a very low voice,
but to the woman listening she seemed irritatingly calm.
Athena climbed on to Jane's bed, as she had so often done in the days
when she and Jane happened to be at Rede Place together--days which had
come far oftener four and five years ago than recently.
It hurt Jane to see Athena there. The contrast between the past and the
present cut so shrewdly. She did not wish to judge her friend--or rather
she did judge her, and very leniently.
Athena could not help what had happened. Of that Jane felt sure. But
still Athena must know the truth--she could not but be aware of the
effect she had had on Lingard; she must know that without meaning it she
had witched his heart away.
But whatever Athena knew or did not know, any allusion to what had
happened would be degrading to them both. Certain things slumber when
left in peace; they leap into life if once discussed. Jane Oglander
believed in the honour of the man she loved. Hew would go away, and in
time he would batten down, fight and conquer his infatuation for Mrs.
Maule.
"Of course I wish to break my engagement. But I would rather not talk
about it," she said, at last.
"But I must talk about it!" cried Athena desperately. "You don't realise
how I feel, Jane, how--how miserable, how ashamed I am about it all! Of
course I know how you must be hating me."
An expression of anguish came over the younger woman's face. She
believed her friend. But deep in her heart was breathed the inarticulate
prayer: "Oh God, do not let her mention Hew--do not let her speak of
Hew!"
Athena suddenly covered her face with her hands. "Oh, Jane, I could not
help it," she wailed, in her low, vibrating voice. "Oh, Jane, tell me
that you know I could not help it!"
"I know you could not help it," repeated Jane mechanically.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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