I found the lady in a careless garb, reclining on a sofa, wan, pale,
and of a sickly aspect On recognising me, she assumed a languidly-smiling
air, and received me with much civility. I took my seat near her. She
began to talk:--
"I am very unwell; got a terrible cold, coming from Dover; been laid up
ever since; a teasing cough, no appetite, and worse spirits than I ever
suffered. Glad you've come to relieve my solitude; not a single soul to
see me; Mrs. Talbot never favours a body with a visit. Pray, how's the
dear girl? Hear her mother's come; heard, it seems, of your intimacy with
Miss Secker; determined to revenge your treason to her goddess; vows she
shall henceforth have no more to say to you."
While waiting for admission, I formed hastily the resolution in what
manner to conduct this interview. My deportment was so solemn, that the
chatterer, glancing at my face in the course of her introductory harangue,
felt herself suddenly chilled and restrained:--
"Why, what now, Colden? You are mighty grave, methinks. Do you repent
already of your new attachment? Has the atmosphere of Philadelphia
reinstated Jane in all her original rights?"
"Proceed, madam. When you are tired of raillery, I shall beg your
attention to a subject in which your honour is deeply concerned; to a
subject which allows not of a jest."
"Nay," said she, in some little trepidation, "if you have any thing to
communicate, I am already prepared to receive it."
"Indeed, Miss Jessup, I _have_ something to communicate. A man of
more refinement and address than I can pretend to would make this
communication in a more circuitous and artful manner; and a man less
deeply interested in the establishment of truth would act with more
caution and forbearance. I have no excuse to plead, no forgiveness to ask,
for what I am now going to disclose. I demand nothing from you but your
patient attention while I lay before you the motives of my present
visit.
"You are no stranger to my attachment to Mrs. Talbot. That my passion
is requited is likewise known to you. That her mother objects to her union
with me, and raises her objections on certain improprieties in my
character and conduct, I suppose, has already come to your knowledge.
"You may naturally suppose that I am desirous of gaming her favour; but
it is not by the practice of fraud and iniquity, and therefore I have not
begun with denying or concealing my faults. Very faulty, very criminal,
have I been; to deny that would be adding to the number of my
transgressions: but I assure you, Miss Jessup, there have been limits to
my follies; there is a boundary beyond which I have never gone. Mrs.
Fielder imagines me much more criminal than I really am, and her opinion
of me--which, if limited in the strictest manner by my merits, would amply
justify her aversion to my marriage with her daughter--is, however,
carried further than justice allows.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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