"It is strange that I did the same, and a very unlucky bench it proved
to me."
"So it did to me, as you shall hear. I had taken up my quarters at that
inn, and for three days had done very well in Brentford. On the third
evening I had just come back, it was nearly dusk, and I took my seat on
the bench, thinking of you. My dog, rather tired, was lying down before
the cart, when all of a sudden I heard a sharp whistle. The dog sprang
on his legs immediately, and ran off several yards before I could prevent
him. The whistle was repeated, and away went the dog and cart like
lightning. I ran as fast as I could, but could not overtake him; and I
perceived that his old master was running ahead of the dog as hard as he
could, and this was the reason why the dog was off. Still I should, I
think, have overtaken him, but an old woman coming out of a door with a
saucepan to pour the hot water into the gutter, I knocked her down and
tumbled right over her into a cellar without steps. There I was, and
before I could climb out again, man, dog, cart, cat's meat and dog's
meat, had all vanished, and I have never seen them since. The rascal
got clear off, and I was a bankrupt. So much for my first set up in
business."
"You forgot to purchase the _good-will_ when you made your bargain,
Timothy, for the stock in trade."
"Very true, Japhet. However, after receiving a very fair share of abuse
from the old woman, and a plaister of hot greens in my face--for she
went supperless to bed, rather than not have her revenge--I walked
back to the inn, and sat down in the tap. The two men next to me were
hawkers; one carried a large pack of dimities and calicoes, and the
other a box full of combs, needles, tapes, scissors, knives, and
mock-gold trinkets. I entered into conversation with them, and, as I
again stood treat, I soon was very intimate. They told me what their
profits were, and how they contrived to get on, and I thought, for a
rambling life, it was by no means an unpleasant one; so having obtained
all the information I required, I went back to town, took out a hawker's
licence, for which I paid two guineas, and purchasing at a shop, to which
they gave me a direction, a pretty fair quantity of articles in the tape
and scissor line, off I set once more on my travels. I took the north
road this time, and picked up a very comfortable subsistence, selling
my goods for a few halfpence here and a few halfpence there, at the
cottages as I passed by; but I soon found out, that without a newspaper,
I was not a confirmed hawker, and the more radical the newspaper the
better. A newspaper will pay half the expenses of a hawker, if he can
read. At every house, particularly every small hedge ale-house, he is
received, and placed in the best corner of the chimney, and has his board
and lodging, with the exception of what he drinks, gratis, if he will
pull out the newspaper and read it to those around him who cannot read,
particularly if he can explain what is unintelligible.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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